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Zoom jokes 🧑🏽‍💻 in 2025

I feel really bad for the class of 2020. They say the year really flies by.
I just didn’t realize it would Zoom.

Spelling matters!
– I was waiting on a Zoom call to start, but client was having technical issues. The client texted and said, “please bare with me.” Thought it was an odd request, but he’s the client.

Eventually we got the video to work, but now I’m fired.

If you’re working on a desktop or laptop, make sure to put on a mask. You wouldn’t want to catch one of those computer viruses.

A man driving down a freeway road at 55 MPH.
He looks out the window and sees a chicken running along side his car. He speeds up to 65 and the chicken is keeping pace with him. He notices that the chicken seems to have multiple legs but before he can confirm it the chicken takes a hard left turn down a dirt road. Intrigued he turns around and goes down the road and finds a chicken farm. He looks on in amazement as all the chickens are zooming around the compound. He sees one chicken standing still pecking the ground and sure enough it has 3 legs. Stunned, he gets out of the car and sees a man throwing feed out for the chickens. He calls out to the farmer who comes over to the fence. The man asks the farmer “whats with all the three legged chickens?” The farmer replies “oh yeah, well my son, wife and I like to eat chicken, especially the leg, so I bred these to have three legs. One for my wife, one for my son and one for me.” The man, still amazed asks “well, how do they taste?” The farmer replies sadly “I don’t know, I haven’t caught one yet.”

The 12 Days of Corona
In the year 2020, the pandemic gave to me:
12 Cancelled Plans
11 Face Masks
10 Sanitizers
9 Murder Hornets
8 Zoom Calls
7 Mental Breakdowns
6 Feet Apart
5 Curbside Pickups
4 Quarantines
3 Travel Restrictions
2 Karens Complaining
And a massive shortage of Grocery Store TP

Bernie, Joe and Donald are on a Zoom call.
Bernie Sanders, Joe Biden, and Donald Trump secretly have regular Zoom conversations.

Bernie: “I dreamed last night that God spoke to me. He said that he wanted me to be president.”

Joe: “That’s funny. I had the exact same dream.”

Donald: “I don’t remember talking to either of you last night.”

A drunk man staggers out of a bar late at night.
– Struggling to keep his balance, he grabs on to a nearby pole to be able to stand still. A few minutes later a fire engine zooms by blaring its sirens. Looking at the truck, the man started running furiously after it and yelling incoherently, but after a good kilometre, he finally collapsed and panting heavily, he yelled out

“You can keep your rotten ice cream!”

Yo mama so stupid
– She wears a face mask on a zoom meeting

Zoom meetings are basically seances with the living…
– Brian, are you there? Make a sound if you can hear us. Is anyone with you? Can you hear us?

I accidentally called a presentation a “slide deck”
– Now everyone on the Zoom meeting knows I’m actually 40

I told a joke over my zoom meeting
– It wasn’t even remotely funny

I like to wrap myself in a blanket when I work from home. You could say I now work undercover.

How does an old man zoom in in Skyrim?
– The elder scrolls

I never skydived before…
– but I once zoomed in very fast on google maps.

A student is late for a zoom class…
“What took you so long?” the teacher asks.
“Technical difficulties” the student answers.
“I’ve heard that excuse a hundred times, let me guess, your wifi didn’t work?”
“My clock”

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