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Brain jokes 🧠🤯 in 2022

I left my campsite and hiked south for 3 miles.
Then I turned east and hiked for 3 miles. I then turned north and hiked for 3 miles, at which time I came upon a bear inside my tent eating my food!
What color was the bear?
– White, since the only place you can do that is the North Pole and polar bears are the only kind of bears that live there.

He has married many women, but has never been married. Who is he?
– A preacher

What has a bottom at the top?
– Legs

What is 3/7 chicken, 2/3 cat and 2/4 goat?
– Chicago

I am taken from a mine and shut up in a wooden case, from which I am never released. And yet I am used by almost everybody. What am I?
– Pencil lead.

What kind of fish performs brain surgery?
– A neurosturgeon.

There is a word in the English language in which the first two letters signify a male, the first three letters signify a female, the first four signify a great man, and the whole word, a great woman. What is the word?
– Heroine

An elevator is on the ground floor. There are four people in the elevator including me. When the lift reaches the first floor, one person gets out and three people get in. The lift goes up to the second floor, 2 people get out, 6 people get in. It then goes up to the next floor up, no-one gets out but 12 people get in. Halfway up to the next floor up the elevator cable snaps, it crashes to the floor. Everyone else dies in the elevator except me. How did I survive?
– I got off on the first floor

What do an island and the letter “t” have in common?
– They are both in the middle of water

A man is looking at a photograph of someone. His friend asks who it is. The man replies, “Brothers and sisters, I have none. But that man’s father is my father’s son.” Who was in the photograph?
– His son.

Why can’t a brain be 12 inches long?
– Because then it would be a foot.

My voice is tender, my waist is slender and I’m often invited to play. Yet wherever I go I must take my bow or else I have nothing to say. What am I?
– A violin

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