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Squirrel Jokes 🐿️ in 2024

HELP!! Squirrels are chasing me!
-They think I’m nuts!

How come when a video of a squirrel putting a nut in a dog gets 18k upvotes and is called “Cute”
-but when I do it it’s a “heinous act” and my dog gets taken away?

Because there is no try.

A wise squirrel once said “you are what you eat”.
-Don’t believe him, he was a nut.

What is squirrels’s least favourite month?
-November

What do you get if you cross a squirrel with an elephant?
-An animal that never forgets where it’s hidden its nuts.

Because Yoda was in charge.
-Why was the joke in the punchline?

you know I want an ADHD cure. when?
-Squirrel

How do you fight a squirrel looking for a nut?
-You beat him off.

Why did the squirrel take her car apart?
-She wanted to see what it was like to get to the nuts and bolts of it.

A squirrel walks up to a tree and says “I forgot to store acorns for winter so now I am dead”
– haha it is funny because the squirrel gets dead.

What’s the best way to catch a squirrel?
-Climb up a tree and act like a nut

Why did the squirrel cross the river on his back?
-Too keep his nuts dry.

What did the squirrel say when he had to decide whether to stay or jump?
– I’m really on the fence about this one.

Why do squirrels swin on there back?
– To keep their nuts dry!

A man was arrested today for feeding the squirrels
-A man was arrested today for feeding the squirrels in the park.

He was feeding them to his dog.

Why did the squirrel get lost in the woods?
-It lost track of time and followed the wrong root.

What do you call a squirrel that flys?
– A flying squirrel.

How do you get a squirrel down from a tree?
-You pull down you pants and show him your nuts.

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