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Politician jokes 👨‍⚖️ in 2024

What do you call a politician who always breaks promises? A promise breaker.

What do you call a politician who always talks but never listens? A talker, not a listener.

Why did the politician bring a mirror to the debate? He wanted to practice his fake smile.

Why did the politician bring a megaphone to the press conference? He wanted to make sure he could talk over the reporters.

What do you call a politician who always panders to the crowd? A populist.

What do you call a politician who always avoids the real issues? A sidestepper.

Why did the politician bring a red pen to the rally? He wanted to mark all of his opponents’ mistakes.

Why did the politician bring a megaphone to the fundraiser? He wanted to make sure everyone heard him thanking his donors.

What do you call a politician who only listens to lobbyists? A sellout.

What do you call a politician who only cares about getting re-elected? A career politician.

Why did the politician bring a notepad to the debate? He wanted to jot down his opponents’ weaknesses.

Why did the politician bring a megaphone to the town hall? He wanted to make sure the crowd could hear his lies clearly.

What do you call a politician who always changes his story? A storyteller.

What do you call a politician who always takes credit for others’ accomplishments? A credit hog.

Why did the politician bring a stopwatch to the debate? He wanted to make sure he had enough time to dodge questions.

Why did the politician bring a calculator to the meeting? He wanted to calculate how much he could benefit from the proposed policy.

What do you call a politician who always avoids tough questions? A dodger.

What do you call a politician who always puts his own needs first? A self-serving politician.

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