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Vegetable jokes 🥕🍅🥒 in 2023

When do you know a banana wants to dance?
– When you see a banana shake!

What did the carrot say when it was told that the swede had won the school writing competition?
– That’s a turnip for the books.

Why shouldn’t you tell secrets in a cornfield?
– Because it’s full of ears.

What’s the best vegetable to have in the car?
– Asparagus

What is R. Kelly’s favorite vegetable?
– Black-eyed Peas

When do you know a banana wants to dance?
– When you see a banana shake!

When should you harvest potatoes?
– On fry-day.

What did the baby corn of corn call his dad?
– Pop corn.

What do you call a vegetable that always bully you?
– A BEATroot

What did the guy do after he ate the vegetable?
– He sold the wheelchair

What did the lettuce say to the celery?
– Quit stalking me.

Why couldn’t the lettuce relax?
– Because she wasn’t cool as a cucumber.

Anyone who thinks onions are the only vegetable that makes you cry
– has never been hit in the face with a turnip.

What’s the most hated vegetable in the world?
– Kim Jong un

Why do fungi have to pay double bus fares?
– Because they take up too mushroom…(mushrooms aren’t strictly a vegetable but we do let them in Secret Seed Society, because they are good friends with vegetables).

What did the carrot say to the celery?
– I know I’m popular, but please stop stalking me.

What is the strongest vegetable?
– A muscle sprout.

What is a chickens favorite vegetable?
– Bawk choy

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