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Planet jokes 🪐🌍🌑 in 2023

What kind of music do planets like?
– Neptunes.

What do vegan black holes say?
– “I’m on a strictly planet based diet”

What’s Hitler’s least favorite planet?
– Jewpiter

Why did Pluto have such a terrible vacation?
– Because he didn’t planet well.

What did Earth say to the other planets?
– “You guys have no life!”

Earth is the third planet from the sun.
– Earth is the third planet from the sun.

My friend is the most average person on the planet yet he loves to go around judging and criticising other people
– He’s really mean

Earth, Venus, Mars, and Jupiter were going to setup a party
– But they failed because nobody knew how to planet

How do you memorialize the death of a planet?
– You write an orbituary.

One alien says to another, “The dominant life forms on the planet earth appear to have developed satellite-based nuclear weapons.”
– The second alien replies, “Are they an emerging intelligence?”

The first alien says, “I don’t think so, they have them aimed at themselves.”

How do planets staying busy during hunting seaso
– By shooting stars

How do you get ready for a trip around the Sun?
– Planet

In space, two aliens are talking to each other very closely
– The first alien says, “The dominant life forms on the Earth planet have developed satellite-based nuclear weapons.”

The second alien asks, “Are they an emerging intelligence?”

The first alien says, “I don’t think so, they have aimed at themselves”

Wild Life
– A bear, a lion and a bat meet up. The bear says, “If I roar in the forests of North America, the entire forest is shivering with fear.” The lion says, “And if I roar on the great plains of Africa, the entire savannah is afraid of me.”

“Big deal!” says the bat. “All I have to do is cough, and the entire planet shuts down.”

The planet earth can’t possibly be flat.
– If it was cats would have pushed everything not nailed down off the edge.

Why do all planets want to date black holes?
– Because they’re so attractive!

What’mArrrs!
– s a space pirate’s favorite planet?

I’m not racist, but…
– If I could put an end to any race on the entire planet, I’d get rid of the marathon.

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