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Cooking jokes 🍳👩‍🍳 in 2023

There were 3 moles living in a hole…
– One day, they wake up to the smell of pancakes cooking. The first mole sticks his head out of the hole and says “I smell pancakes!” The second mole sticks his head out of the hole and says “I smell syrup!” The last mole tries to stick his head out of the hole, but gets stuck behind the other two, so he said “All I smell is molasses.”

I met a dyslexic woman at a bar last night…
– I took her home and she ended up cooking my sock.

I love cooking with wine
– Sometimes I add it to the food

This joke has to be told to someone in person
This joke has three parts. A man is driving and his wife asks him to slow down, he slaps her an says I’m the one driving not you .
The second part is, the woman is cooking food for her and her husband and the husband asks her not to put so much salt in, she slaps him and says I’m the one cooking not you
The fourth part is…
person listening: what you said there were three parts.
I’m the one telling the joke not you

Why did the chef put his hand in the hot cooking pot?
– Because he was feeling a tad chili!

My friend’s father wanted to be in the army, but owing to dyslexia, he became a chef. But that didn’t dampen his attitude. He went all buns blazing in the kitchen!

My ex-gf claims I dumped her for being a feminist…
– Which is completely wrong! I dumped her for not doing my laundry, cleaning my dishes, or cooking my dinner.

Cooking meat dishes for little men is one of my specialties. Make gnome mistake!

The funny thing about a mute Thai chef is that he can wok the wok,
– but he can never talk the talk!

Why did the head chef’s son put salt and pepper on the head of his father?
– Because he was a seasoned professional!

What should you do before cooking the vegetables?
– Remove the wheelchair

I love cooking dogs and children.
– But I hate using commas.

Cooking with French ingredients always makes me depressed.
– Yesterday I almost lost the huile d’olive.

A favorite gun for any chef is a-salt-rifle!

I told a joke about cooking, but no one laughed at it. I guess it didn’t pan out!

I saw a Chinese cooking utensil that was gluten-free, carbon-neutral, and as well as vegan. I think it’s called a wok!

As my friend dissed my cooking, I threw a spice jar at him. Guess he didn’t see it cumin!

The kid yam was scolded for being rude, but he blatantly replied, ” I yam, what I yam”.

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