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Walmart jokes in 2025

What do you call a Walmart employee who’s always on the phone? A “call center” associate.

What do you call a Walmart employee who’s always cleaning? A “sanitation” associate.

Why did the Walmart shopper bring a helicopter? To get a bird’s eye view of the vastness of Walmart.

Why did the Walmart shopper bring a compass and a map? To find their way out of the store.

Why did the Walmart shopper bring a compass, map, GPS, and a sherpa? To survive the journey through Walmart.

What did the Walmart employee say when the customer asked if they had any fine jewelry? “We have a jewelry section, it’s called Claire’s.”

What did the Walmart employee say when the customer asked if they had any high-end skincare products?

Why did the Walmart employee wear sunglasses? He was “rolling back” the prices.

Why did the Walmart employee wear a construction vest? To “build” savings for the customers.

What do you call a Walmart employee who’s always counting inventory? A “stock” associate.

What do you call a Walmart employee who’s always busy with inventory? An “inventory” associate.

Why did the Walmart shopper bring a flashlight? To navigate the “dark” aisles.

What did the Walmart employee say when the customer asked if they had any high-end skincare products? “We have a high-end skincare section, it’s called the cleaning aisle.”

What did the Walmart employee say when the customer asked where the bathroom was? “Down the aisle, take a left at the clearance items, and it’s the third door on the right.”

What did the Walmart employee say when the customer asked if they had any luxury handbags? “We have a luxury handbag section, it’s called Walmart clearance.”

Why did the Walmart employee need a parachute? To “drop” the prices.

Why did the Walmart employee wear a superhero costume and cape? To fight the villain of high prices and save the day for customers.

What do you call a Walmart employee who’s always at the cash register? A “checkout” associate.

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