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Mermaid Jokes 🧜‍♀️ in 2024

Where do mermaids keep their money saved?
– In a riverbank.

What do Mermaids and the Washington Metro system have in common?
– Well, they are both under DC.

Which TV show is Ariel’s favorite?
– Whale Of Fortune.

What lies at the bottom of the sea and shakes?
– A nervous wreck!

Say this aloud: Why do mermaids wear seashells?
– Because b-shells are too small and d-shells are too big!

A mermaid finally got off the couch and hit the gym once she found a dolphin physical trainer.
– She moved with a porpoise.

Why do mermaids hate playing tennis?
– They are scared of getting caught in the net.

What would an Instagrammer mermaid say?
– I washed up today this way.

How does a mermaid make friends with a dolphin?
– On porpoise!

If you kill a mermaid and steep its tail…
…does that make you gill-tea for murder?

What do you call a Samoan Mermaid?
– A walrus.

Who makes sure to keep the ocean spick and span?
– Mermaids.

Why are mermaids so healthy?
– Because they get tons of vitamin sea.

How did the octopus make the mermaid laugh?
– Tentacles! (Ten tickles)

I need help. Whenever I call my redheaded wife “my little mermaid” she always lights up
– How else can I politely say “your bottom half smells like fish”?

What did everyone say about the story of half of a mermaid washing up on the beach?
– It was only a tail.

When does the Little Mermaid ride seahorses?
– When she plays water polo.

Why did the mermaid swim across the ocean?
– To get to the other tide!

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