Good jokes in 2021

Whatโ€™s the difference between a well dressed man on a unicycle and a poorly dressed man on a bike?
-Attire!

Whatโ€™s the different between a cat and a comma?
-A cat has claws at the end of paws; A comma is a pause at the end of a clause.

What do you call a man who canโ€™t stand?
-Neil.

What did the pirate say when he turned 80?
-Aye matey.

Why are pirates called pirates?
-Because they arrgh!

How many tickles does it take to tickle an octopus?
-Tentacles!

What do you call a fake noodle?
-An impasta.

What did the horse say after it tripped?
-โ€œHelp! Iโ€™ve fallen and I canโ€™t giddyup!โ€

Why did the frog take the bus to work today?
-His car got toad away.

Why canโ€™t you explain puns to kleptomaniacs?
-They always take things literally.

Want to hear a joke about a piece of paper?
-Never mindโ€ฆ itโ€™s tearable.

How do you make a tissue dance?
-Put a little boogie in it.

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