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Good jokes in 2023

What’s the difference between a well dressed man on a unicycle and a poorly dressed man on a bike?
-Attire!

What’s the different between a cat and a comma?
-A cat has claws at the end of paws; A comma is a pause at the end of a clause.

What do you call a man who can’t stand?
-Neil.

Why can’t you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom?
-Because the “P” is silent.

What sits at the bottom of the sea and twitches?
-A nervous wreck.

How did Darth Vader know what Luke got him for Christmas?
-He felt his presents!

What did the bald man exclaim when he received a comb for a present?
-Thanks— I’ll never part with it!

What’s the best part about living in Switzerland?
-I don’t know, but the flag is a big plus.

I waited all night to see where the sun would rise…
-And then it dawned on me.

What does a nosy pepper do?
-Gets jalapeño business!

What do you call someone with no body and no nose?
-Nobody knows!

What rhymes with orange
-No it doesn’t.

Ever tried to eat a clock?
-It’s time-consuming.

What did the pirate say when he turned 80?
-Aye matey.

Why are pirates called pirates?
-Because they arrgh!

How many tickles does it take to tickle an octopus?
-Tentacles!

What do you call a fake noodle?
-An impasta.

What did the horse say after it tripped?
-“Help! I’ve fallen and I can’t giddyup!”

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