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Vampire Jokes 🧛 in 2023

What is a vampire’s favourite animal?
– A giraffe.

How do you beat a vampire at poker?
– Raise the stakes!

How does a vampire get across the ocean?
-a boat

Did you know vampires are dog people?
-After all, they have the biggest canines.

why cant vampires tell jokes right?
-all their jokes just SUCK

I think that one puppet from Sesame Street is my favorite vampire ever.
-Some people claim he doesn’t count, but I’m certain that he does.

What can you tell about a vampire who attacks during the day?
-He’s a daydrinker.

What did the vampire say at the blood bank?
-I’d like to make a withdrawal

How to you tell if a vampire is sick?
-By how much he is coffin

Why do vampires clean their teeth three times a day?
-To prevent bat breathe.

What do you call a lineup of food with lots of garlicky dishes?
– Buffet the Vampire Slayer!

Why did the vampire want to become an artist?
-Because he liked to draw blood

What kind of cheap beer do vampires drink?
-Blood Light

A priest, a rabbi, a minister, a vampire, a nun, a gorilla and a blonde walk into a bar.
– The bartender says “what is this, some kind of joke??”

What do you call a cross between a computer and a vampire bat?
– Love at first bite <3

what do you call a vampire that drinks blood between meals?

What do you call a russian vampire?
-Blyat cyka

What do vampire footballers have at half-time?
– Blood oranges.

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