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Vampire Jokes ๐Ÿง› in 2021

What is a vampireโ€™s favourite animal?
– A giraffe.

How do you beat a vampire at poker?
– Raise the stakes!

Whatโ€™s a vampireโ€™s favorite ethnic food?
-Maxi Pad Thai.

If I had to choose, I think I’d rather be a Vegetarian Vampire.
-Beets the alternative.

What is the favorite drink of a vampire?
– bloody mary

I’m afraid my wife might be a vampire.
-She like to stay out all night, all of her guy friends invite her over before she can visit them and she always seems genuinely concerned when I try to stab her with a wooden stake.

What do you call it when a vampire loses track of his coffin?
-A grave situation!

What do vampires cross the sea in?
– Blood vessels.

Robert Pattinson is an awful vampire
-It took him 11 years to figure out how to turn into a bat

Oh my God!!! You’re turning into a vampire?! I didn’t even bite you yet!!
-That, kids, is what’s known as PREMATURE EDRACULATION

Why do vampires always dress so nice?
– Because theyโ€™re so vein!

What do you get when you mix a snowman with a vampire?
-frostbite!

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