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Mothers day jokes 👩‍👦‍👦 in 2024

Why is a computer so smart?
– Because it listens to its motherboard.

Silence is golden. Unless you have kids, then silence is suspicious.

Q: Why is Mother’s Day before Father’s Day?
– A: So the kids can spend all their Christmas money on Mom.

How do you keep little cows quiet, so their mommy can sleep late?
– Use the moooooote button.

You know you’re a mom when you understand why Mama Bear’s porridge was too cold.

Parenting is buying a bounce house and swing set just so you can sit on the patio and drink wine in peace.

To the woman who rosé me right.

It’s spicy” is a universal mom code for “I don’t want to share.”

What did the mommy spider say to the Baby spider?
– You spend too much time on the web.

Kid: “What’s a man?”
– Dad: “A man is someone who is responsible and cares for their family.”
– Kid: “I hope one day I can be a man just like mom!”

I’m going to donate these bags of clothes to Goodwill. But first, I’m going to drive around with them in my trunk for four months.

Joker: Why did the monster’s mother knit him three socks?
– Harvey: I have no clue.
– Joker: She heard he grew another foot!

What are the three quickest ways to spread a rumor?
– The internet, telephone, and telling your mom.

Motherhood is fun and all, but have you ever had the house alone on a Saturday?

Knock, knock.
– Who’s there?
– Bacon.
– Bacon who?
– Bacon brownies for Mother’s Day.

Why did the Mother’s Day gift arrive the day after Mother’s Day?
– It was chocoLATE.

Q: What do you call a small mother?
– A: A Minimum

I don’t want to sleep like a baby. I want to sleep like my husband.

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