Anti jokes in 2022

How does the white-tail deer jump higher than the average house?
– This is due to their powerful hind legs and the fact that the average house can’t jump.

What did one ant say to the other ant?
– Nothing. Ants communicate by pheromones, not speech.

Why can’t Tommy the T. rex clap?
– Because dinosaurs have been extinct for 65 million years.

The best anti jokes?
– Here are some of my favorite ones: One, uno, ein, un.

Where was the Constitution signed?
– At the bottom.

Why did the chicken cross the road?
– Chickens do not have the cognitive ability to reason. Therefore, it was random.

How do you confuse someone?
– Paint yourself green and throw forks at them.

Two muffins are in an oven. One says to the other, “Dang, it’s hot in here.”
– The other replies, “Yeah, probably like 350 degrees.”

Have you ever noticed that when geese fly in a ‘V’ formation, one line is always longer than the other? Do you know why that is?
– Because there are more geese in that line.

When is a dad officially a dad?
– When his jokes no longer get laughs.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor?
– “I lost my tractor.”

How do you get someone to stop swinging on the tire swing?
– Snip the rope.