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Anti jokes in 2021

Someone stole my mood ring.
– I donโ€™t know how I feel about that.

A guy walks into a bar.
-Then he gets a drink and leaves.

Roses are dead.
– Violets are dead. I am a bad gardener.

A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender asks, โ€œWhy the long face?โ€
– The horse, incapable of reason and understanding human language, shits on the floor and walks back out the bar door.

What do you call a pigeon that canโ€™t find its way back home?
– A pigeon.

Why do flamingos stand on one leg?
– If they lifted up the other one, theyโ€™d fall over.

What do you call a fish with no eyes?
– It doesnโ€™t even matter.

This girl invited me to her house, saying nobody was home.
– I got there, and nobody was home.

What do you call a joke that isn’t funny?
– A sentence.

What makes you laugh harder than your own child?
– A whoopie cushion.

Why do you never see elephants hiding behind trees?
– Theyโ€™re so good at it.

Iโ€™d never tell you a pizza joke.
– Itโ€™s way too cheesy.

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