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It’s So Cold Jokes 🥶 in 2023

It’s so cold…
-Harvey Weinstein is keeping his hands to himself.

It’s so cold outside…
-I brushed against a car in the parking lot and accidently keyed it with my nipple.

Why is the letter B so cold?
-Because it’s between the AC.

It was so cold…
-every kind of cereal in the cupboard was frosted – including the boxes!

It was so cold . . .
-we had to chop up the piano for firewood – but we only got two chords.

It was so cold . . .
-we had to carry around hammers and chisels so we could get out of our parkas!

It’ so cold
-I’m shivering like a mobster in a tax office.

It was so cold . . .
-the rats were bribing the alley cats for a snuggle.

It was so cold . . .
-terrorists started to stockpile weapons-grade hot chocolate!

It was so cold back last winter,
-Starbucks started serving coffee on a stick.

It was so cold…
-hitchhikers were holding up pictures of thumbs!

It was so cold…
-roosters were rushing into Kentucky Fried Chicken and begging to use the pressure cooker!

It’s so cold the optometrist is giving away
-free ice scrapers with eyeglasses.

What kind of pictures would two people like to take during the cold weather?
-They would definitely take polar-oids!

It was so cold . . .
-Levi Strauss started manufacturing electric jeans!

It’s so cold I had to use my supermarket loyalty card to get the ice off my car.
-It only got 10% off.

It was so cold…
– my nasal passages were so frozen up that when I sneezed – my eyes popped out onto the snow! It took me over two hours to find them –

It was so cold . . .
-when we parked the sled, we either had to plug in the dogs – or keep them running in place!

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