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Thursday jokes in 2024

What do you do when Tuesday is standing outside your bathroom door?
– You let it sink in.

What is the best Tuesday motivation?
– Thinking that there is a taco, out there in the universe thinking of you too!

One small positive thought in the morning can change your whole day.

Thursday is perhaps the worst day of the week. It’s nothing in itself; it just reminds you that the week has been going on too long.

How do you make a Tuesday better?
– You can Choose(Tues)day and just go with it until Friday.

Optimism is a happiness magnet. If you stay positive, good things will happen to you.

Do you know what kind of bird doesn’t fly on fridays?
– A one that died on Thursday…

I only drink on days beginning with “T”
– Tuesday, Thursday, today and tomorrow

How do you keep the dreams alive on Tuesdays?
– By hitting the snooze button.

I bought a used Lamborghini cheap with hopes of making a quick buck. My friend offered to flip it for me.
– He was as good as his word. The funeral is Thursday.

Some people call it Thursday, I like to call it Friday Eve.

Why didn’t the teacher read Tuesday morning news?
– Because she didn’t want additional Tuesday mournings.

How can people like Tuesday?
– By thinking that it is the farthest from the coming Monday.

I’ve decided I’ll be cremated.
– My appointment is 10am on Thursday.

What does Taco Tuesday say to Dunkin Donuts?
– I have fillings too.

A week ago Thursday was National Procrastination Day. . . .
– Time to celebrate!

Why can’t the kids take a ferry to school on Tuesday?
– Because they have tuesday(to-use-da) roadway to reach the school.

What do a Tuesday morning and a stress ball have in common?
– They both are less busy than a Monday morning.

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