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Beer Jokes 🍺 in 2023

What do you call a monster with a hot dog in his beer mug?

A skeleton walks into a bar.
-Orders a beer and a mop.

How often should you put an orange slice in your beer?
-Once, in a Blue Moon.

A Roman walks into a bar, holds up two fingers, and says..
-Five Beers, please!

How does a geometry teacher drink beer?
-From pint A to pint B.

Never look at your beer as half empty.
– Look at it as halfway to your next beer.

This one is puntastic!
-I’d tap that.

A guy walks into a bar on Valentine’s Day and orders a beer.
-A guy walks into a bar on Valentine’s Day and orders a beer. “I asked my wife what she wanted for Valentine’s Day. She said a divorce,” the guy tells the bartender. “Oh, no. What did you do?” the bartender asks. “I just told her I hadn’t planned on spending that much,” the guy replies.

Wife crashed the car again today. She told the police the man she collided with was on his mobile phone and drinking a can of beer.
-Police said he can do what he likes in his own living room.

Stop trying to make everyone happy.
– You’re not beer.

What kind of beer do Canadians get when they head towards the bathroom.

A Roman walks into a bar
-He holds up two fingers and says “give me five beers.”

For those “I hate everyone” days.
-Wish you were beer.

Apparently, drinking a pint of beer shortens your lifespan by nine minutes.
-According to my calculations I died some time in 1829.

Why do frogs taste similar to beer?
-Because of the hops.

What is the definition of a balanced diet?
-A beer in each hand.

A great joke about the vitalness of beer
-Vitamin B? You mean beer?

I don’t have a beer gut.
-I have a protective covering for my rock hard abs

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