Beer is a well enjoyed drink around many countries in the world, though some take it more seriously then others. There is no shortage of beer jokes of all types and as the range of products available continues to grow and expand into new areas there will certainly be many more to come.
What kind of beer do Canadians get when they head towards the bathroom.
A Roman walks into a bar
-He holds up two fingers and says “give me five beers.”
For those “I hate everyone” days.
-Wish you were beer.
Apparently, drinking a pint of beer shortens your lifespan by nine minutes.
-According to my calculations I died some time in 1829.
Why do frogs taste similar to beer?
-Because of the hops.
What is the definition of a balanced diet?
-A beer in each hand.
A great joke about the vitalness of beer
-Vitamin B? You mean beer?
I don’t have a beer gut.
-I have a protective covering for my rock hard abs
Every time I have a beer, my wife keeps nagging me and telling me I drink too much
-I mean come on, who needs to hear that nine times a day?
In heaven there is no beer,
-which is why we drink it here.
A man walks in a bar and shouts “free beers outside!” So everyone in the bar, except the bartender, ran outside in excitement.
-The bartender, visibly angry, yells at the man “what the hell did you do that for? Now i have no customers!!”
The man says “Sorry mister, i honestly didnt fink any of those men would be brave enough to fight a grizzly beer, let alone free of them”
One day a father went out for some cold beer and threw the 18 pack in the back seat on top of the infant in the car seat
-Fortunately it was light beer.
German Beer Jokes
Some of the best beer in the world comes from Germany and the country certainly celebrates its trademark beverage in big ways. As a huge exporter of beer of all kinds they are often known for the best and most high end beers on the market, and the funniest beer jokes are certainly based around these facts. With festivals and beer steins the community seems to embrace the best beer jokes openly and welcome them around the table and around town. Greeting each other with a beer in hand and a cheesy beer joke on the lips can bring any set of people a little closer together and help others feel welcome.
Everyone is welcome to enjoy the top beer jokes as they drink the top quality beers, and there is a welcoming and open atmosphere in many places that is not the same when travelling other countries. Perhaps the flow of alcohol in some areas create a more relaxed pace, and it does differ in all areas as everything does, but the German beer joke is a staple in any comedians pocket and they will continue to adapt to the new changes in the beer industry.
As beer companies shift to try and appeal to more women customers and to increase their attraction to some of the men who are not beer drinkers, there has been a surge in flavored beers that are including fruity and fresh tastes. These are sometimes popular and sometimes they are the root of silly beer jokes and one liner beer jokes about how they aren’t really beer anymore and who chooses to drink them. While some of these new flavors may be a hit there are several cheesy beer jokes about them being unnecessary and some of them are not a great combination of flavors creating the funniest beer jokes.
One can not consider beer jokes without considering the beer stein. These drink vessels are a great source for funny beer jokes partly due to their size. A beer stein is a large cup like glass that holds large amounts of alcohol, suitable only for beer and water, and they can come in comedically large sizes. Anyone with the right size beer stein never needs more than one beer, and this has certainly been the root of many of the best beer jokes, and the several other clean beer jokes that were maybe not really funny but are funny enough to be shared around the table.
Created in many ways and decorated in several different styles they are a staple in many homes and bars. A corny beer joke may point out that the size of the beer stein affects the beer chosen, or that they are certainly not meant for light drinkers. They are created to keep it at an ideal temperature and be easy to drink while chatting with friends or joking around with hilarious beer jokes.
Beer Google Jokes
When someone gets drunk and they begin to see things differently then they do when they are sober, if is often referred to as beer googles. This is a state of inebriation that keeps the person functioning but not necessarily making the choices they would when they are sober, and many short beer jokes about beer googles refer to how they see people and decide how attractive they are. These are certainly not beer jokes for kids
, but they can have some cute beer google jokes about finding new pets on the way home when a racoon seems as cute as a kitten, though when used in reference to people they can become quite insulting. One beer googles joke that has remained popular in it’s many forms is that when you start to see through beer googles it is time to stop drinking and go home.
Beer jokes go back years, possibly centuries, as it is one of the oldest drinks on record and was used often when drinking water was not safe, and they will continue for decades more as the popularity of the drink is not dying down. It is often found in homes as well as bars and restaurants, and easily available in a wide variety. As the producers aim to gather more of the market new products with different tastes and flavors are being made all the time and these will only fuel the creation of new jokes about the flavor and why they need to be changed at all.