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Pirate jokes 🏴‍☠️ in 2025

How do pirates like to cook their steaks?
-On a BAAAARRRRRBECUE!

How do pirates make their money?
-By hook or by crook!

What do you call a pirate’s hairstyle?
– A crew cut!

What’s a pirates favorite part of a song?
-The hook!

Why are pirates called pirates?
– Because they arrrr!

What do pirates do on Black Friday?
– Shop the sails!

Why does the pirate carry his sword?
Because swords can’t walk. Duh.

Why did the pirate give up playing golf?
-Because he kept hooking the ball!

What print do pirates wear on their socks?
– Arrrrgghyle!

What do you call a pirate with no arms and no legs?
-An expert pirate.

Where’s a pirate’s favorite place to eat breakfast?
– IHOP!

How do you turn a pirate furious?
– Take away the “p.”

What do you call a pirate with three eyes? P
– Piiirate!

How did the pirate get his Jolly Roger so cheaply?
– He bought it on sail.

What is a vampire’s pet peeve?
– A Tourniquet!

To err is human
– To arr pirate.

What does the captain keep up his sleevie?
-His armie.

What did the pirate wear on Halloween?
-A pumpkin patch.

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