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Psychology jokes 🧠 in 2022

Child-psychologists…
– Hear touching stories from time to time.

I’ve recently been reading a book on reverse psychology ,
– or have I?

What do you get when you cross a banana peel with a psychologist ?
– A freudian slip.

What did the ghost tell the psychologist at his first therapy session?
– I used to know who I was, now I just feel like I’m drifting through life.

Why did the psychology major struggle so much during his memory exam?
– He couldn’t remember anything because he blanked out.

Knock knock

– Who’s there?

– I’m a…

– I’m a who?

– I’m a dual personality…OMG…so am I!

Why did the dogs suddenly start salivating?
– They heard the name ‘Ivan Pavlov’ and it rang a bell.

What was Waldo going to start psychotherapy?
– He wanted to find himself.

What do you call a psychologist’s clothes?
– Shrinkwrap

Did you hear about that psychologist’s awesome speech last night?
– It was amazing! The crowd was really eating it up. Everyone was going absolutely sane.

“After 12 years of therapy, my psychotherapist said something that brought tears to my eyes.”
– “What did he say?” “No hablo inglés.”

Child walks past the parents bedroom,
– looks inside and mumbles: And you want to send me to a psychologist for thumb sucking.

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