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Avocado jokes 🥑 in 2023

What does the cash-strapped avocado say to his wife?
– “We have no money left, we’ve officially hit guac bottom!”

What is an avocado’s favourite game to play at the carnival?
– Guac-a-mole

My avocado car has broken down. It’s beyond re-pear.


What did the tortilla chip say when he was threatening the avocado?
– I’m going to have you guac-ing in your boots.

Why do avocados not like catching public transport?
– Because they av’-a-car-do

What’s an avocado’s favorite arcade game?
– Guac-a-mole

You’re everything I avo wanted

What is an avocado’s favourite type of music?
– Guac and roll.

What do you get if you cross an avocado with a radio?
– A guakie-talkie.

What do drunk avocados say to their friends at house parties?
– Let’s get smashed!

Why shouldn’t you put avocados in your eyes?
– You could get guacoma.

How do you measure the molar mass of guacamole?
– With Avocado’s Constant.

Got myself into a sticky situation with an avocado; I was stuck between a guac and a hard place.

What is an avocado’s favourite game?
– Guac-a-mole.

Why are romantic comedies an avocados favourite genre of movies?
– Because they love living happily avo after

Lil guac

What did the avocado half say to the other avocado half?
– Without you, I’m empty inside.

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