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Programming Jokes 💻 in 2025

Why do programmers like dark mode?
– Because light attracts bugs

What do cats and programmers have in common?
-When either one is unusually happy and excited, an appropriate question would be, “did you find a bug?”

A programmer’s wife tells him: “While you’re at the store, get some milk”.
– He never comes back.

Scientists and programmers have gotten together to write computer code that will not only warn of future global warming but also take credit for inventing the internet.
-It’s an new Al-Gore-rithm

Programming jokes are fun…
– but only when executed properly.

Why was the programmer always running into walls?
-He couldn’t see sharp.

The two most difficult things in programming…
– The two most difficult things in programming are memory management, naming things, and off by one errors.

My girlfriend told me I care more about my programming job than about her.
-I told her she is the #1 thing I care about.

What do the programmers do when they pay respect?
-They printf

Harry Potter was a programmer
-He is fluent in Python

A man is smoking a cigarette and blowing smoke rings into the air. His girlfriend becomes irritated with the smoke and says,
-Can’t you see the warning on the cigarette pack? Smoking is hazardous to your health!” To this, the man replies, “I am a programmer. We don’t worry about warnings; we only worry about errors.”

How did the Programmer lose weight?
– Hey switched to a byte sized diet.

The programmer got stuck in the shower because the instructions on the shampoo said
-Lather. Rinse. Repeat

A programmer gets sent to the store by his wife. His wife says, “Get a gallon of milk, and if they have eggs, get a dozen.”
-The programmer returns home with 12 gallons of milk and says, “They had eggs.”
edit: I know guys, I know, it’s supposed to be 13, I messed up the wording, please forgive me

Why did the programmer quit his job?
-He didn’t get arrays

I was blind, so my friend suggested me to learn programming.
-Now I csharp.

What do programmers and exterminators have in common?
-They both spend most of their time fighting bugs.

Every time there is a new project,
– we programmers swear to ourselves that we will code it better this time

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