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Nurse Jokes 👩‍⚕️ in 2022

Why was the nurse tip-toeing around the medicine cabinet?
-She was scared of waking up the sleeping pills.

How many nurses does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
-None, they just get a nursing student to do it.

Why was the squirrel such a good night nurse?
-He could handle the ER going nuts after midnight.

Did you get to know about the nurse who injured his entire left side?
-Don’t worry, he’s all right now.

What Do Transplant Nurses Hate?

What did the nurse say to the tonsil?
– You should get dressed. The doctor is going to take you out.

How was the invisible man cured?
-The nurse took him to the ICU.

Did you hear about the guy who had his entire left side cut off?
-He’s all right now.

What did the nurse say to the rocket ship?
-It’s time for your booster shot.

Why did the new nurse try to make eye contact with her patient?
-The senior nurse asked her to cauterize.

What did the nurse said when a boy told her he stood on a LEGO?
-Try to block out the pain.

What did the nursing student ask when the teacher started teaching about D&C?
-Is this chapter about where Washington is?

What do you call two ITU nurses holding hands?
-A synapse.

What did Dracula say to the nurse?
-Please call the doctor. I can’t stop coffin.

How many nursing school students does it take to fit a screw on the wall?
-None, as students of nursing cannot put nails on anyone.

What is the opposite of you’re out?

What did the nurse reply when someone asked, “Does an apple a day keeps the doctor away?
-Yes, if you aim it nicely.

What did the new night nurse reply when the senior nurse asked her about nitrates?
-Are they cheaper in comparison to day rates?

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