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Painting jokes 🎨🖼️🖌️ in 2022

Whether painting a wall or painting a portrait, there are painting jokes to fit. From the cost of the materials to the skill that it takes to do it well. With many types of paint available and the projects that go with them, there is nearly endless fodder for jokes and puns.

Did you hear about the artist who just died?
– Guess he had too many strokes.

What’s red and smells like blue paint?
– Red paint.

Termite Food
– So I work in a retail store where we routinely have shipments of freight arriving on wooden skids. A truck driver will come by every week or so, and pick up the empty skids so they can be reused.

Out of curiosity, I asked the driver if he ever worried about termites getting into his trailer. He said the brand of skids we use are chemically treated, so termites won’t eat them. You can tell the difference because instead of being regular wood, they’re usually painted blue.

So I said, “In other words, they can’t palate pallets in that pallette?”

I was once in an art gallery once looking at a painting of Margaret Thatcher in a bikini …
– a security guard wandered over to me and said “sir you can’t wear that in here”

What did the painter do when he was angry?
– He made a scene.

Which painter had the most bubbly personality? Philippe de Champaigne.

What do you call a person whose job is paint cars.
– Car Painter

A Nigerian Governor wants to paint the Government house.
– A Nigerian Governor wants to paint the Government house. He calls for quotation….
Chinese guy quoted 3 million.
European guy quoted 7 million.
Nigerian guy quoted 10 million.
The Governor asked the chinese guy..”..
how did u quote 3 million..?”
Chinese guy replied ..”1 million for paint, 1 million for labour and 1 million profit..”
The Governor asked european guy..
He replied-“.. 3 million for paint 2 million for labour 2 million profit..”
The Governor asked Nigerian guy.. He replied….”4 million for you…”3 million for me…. and we will give “3 million to the chinese guy and ask him to paint..!!”
The Nigerian guy got the contract!
This is the system that has continued to milk Nigeria dry.
Could be a joke but it’s a reality today!…..
Have a glorious day.

I hired an ex-pilot to do some painting in my house
– Turns out he’s pretty good at it! He did a great job of the the landing.

A model asked a painter girl
– “Why do you always paint me in black and white”

“There is no u in color” She said

One time Lucy tried to paint the sky,
– but she blue it.

Just watched a movie where a mad scientist rigs a DeLorean to time travel and he paints everything purple, it’s called…
– “Back to the Fuschia”

Two drunk men were walking down the road when they see a nice house..
– Carl goes ‘Eh, I bet we can push that’
John goes ‘Yeaah but let’s take our shirts off so we don’t get paint on them’

They take their shirts off and hang them off a tree branch and start pushing…. the building.

A thief comes and steals their shirts…

*3 minutes later*
r>Carl – ‘John ! Look we left our shirts behind let’s keep pushing’

I don’t know why my painting career never took off
– Doctors always told me I was on the artistic spectrum.

What was the first thing the artist said on calling up his best friend?
– Yellow?

What’s the difference between the crucifixion of Jesus and a painting of Jesus?
– It only takes one nail to hang the painting.

Norwegian naval ships all have large bar codes painted on their hulls…
– So when they return to port a sailor can scan da navy in.

What’s the difference between the crucifixion of Jesus and a painting of Jesus?
– It only takes one nail to hang the painting.

Artistic Painting Jokes

Painting has been a profession for centuries, and has always been a topic of many silly painting jokes. Those artists who create painting of people, landscapes, and more, as well as abstract artists will all find themselves on the receiving end of funny painting jokes. There will always be those who do not consider it a valid job or profession, though it requires talent, patience, and is a significant time investment. Cheesy painting jokes about those paintings and their locations in museums and art galleries around the world, and corny painting jokes may address how long each takes and the time spent with the painting rather than with people.

There are also nearly endless short painting jokes about which type of painting is most popular and individual opinions on them. Some will make pointed and hilarious painting jokes about what makes art and whether some abstract paintings are art or if they are not. Corny painting jokes assume that people can determine something they do not find fits their preferences is not art at all.

House Painting

Another type of painting that is the source of many top painting jokes is house or business painting. This includes the walls and doors, windows, fences, and both the inside and outside of buildings. Funny painting jokes are sure to be used when any mistake has been used, or when a ladder is missing and other methods are used. Clean painting jokes will also address how it seems so simple but is really focused on details and require practice to do it well. There are many ways in which a wall or fence can be painted, and there are short painting jokes about ho it shouldn’t be as difficult or require talent but it does, many find the appearance of a simple task and the contrast of how hard it can be to be very funny.

Construction jokes, renovation jokes, and building jokes are all used in concert with the top painting jokes. These are all tasks that require experience and teaching to get right, and their outcomes are vital to the success of the business as well as to the safety of the people who will be using that space. People who work in this industry in any way are sure to hear all of the top painting jokes, and they are also most likely to share them with others who are in the industry as a way to bond and have fun together.

One of the times that the shortest painting jokes are shared is during a project. When there is actively painting going on in the building there will be an increase in the jokes and painting puns that are shared.

Who Uses Painting Jokes

The best painting jokes for kids are found in art classes and activities. They are one of the ways that the experience can be rounded out and additional focuses added for those who do not enjoy the topic as much. Cute painting jokes can help to make the experience more enjoyable to others. This helps to boost the attention paid and their memory of the topics including color theory.

Those who teach painting classes, and other art lasses, may use them to lighten the mood in the spaces and to set the tone for the class. Painters will use them to share their passion and their families and friends will use them to share their appreciation for those they love. Others who are art critics or who work with critics will know the best painting jokes and puns, and will certainly use them not only in their reviews but also when talking to their coworkers.

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Starting with A
Starting with B
Starting with C
Starting with D
Starting with E
Starting with F
Starting with G
Starting with H
Starting with I
Starting with J
Starting with K
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Starting with M
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    • Artistic Painting Jokes

    Painting has been a profession for centuries, and has always been a topic of many silly painting jokes. Those artists who create painting of people, landscapes, and more, as well as abstract artists will all find themselves on the receiving end of funny painting jokes. There will always be those who do not consider it a valid job or profession, though it requires talent, patience, and is a significant time investment. Cheesy painting jokes about those paintings and their locations in museums and art galleries around the world, and corny painting jokes may address how long each takes and the time spent with the painting rather than with people.

    There are also nearly endless short painting jokes about which type of painting is most popular and individual opinions on them. Some will make pointed and hilarious painting jokes about what makes art and whether some abstract paintings are art or if they are not. Corny painting jokes assume that people can determine something they do not find fits their preferences is not art at all.

    House Painting

    Another type of painting that is the source of many top painting jokes is house or business painting. This includes the walls and doors, windows, fences, and both the inside and outside of buildings. Funny painting jokes are sure to be used when any mistake has been used, or when a ladder is missing and other methods are used. Clean painting jokes will also address how it seems so simple but is really focused on details and require practice to do it well. There are many ways in which a wall or fence can be painted, and there are short painting jokes about ho it shouldn’t be as difficult or require talent but it does, many find the appearance of a simple task and the contrast of how hard it can be to be very funny.

    Construction jokes, renovation jokes, and building jokes are all used in concert with the top painting jokes. These are all tasks that require experience and teaching to get right, and their outcomes are vital to the success of the business as well as to the safety of the people who will be using that space. People who work in this industry in any way are sure to hear all of the top painting jokes, and they are also most likely to share them with others who are in the industry as a way to bond and have fun together.

    One of the times that the shortest painting jokes are shared is during a project. When there is actively painting going on in the building there will be an increase in the jokes and painting puns that are shared.

    Who Uses Painting Jokes

    The best painting jokes for kids are found in art classes and activities. They are one of the ways that the experience can be rounded out and additional focuses added for those who do not enjoy the topic as much. Cute painting jokes can help to make the experience more enjoyable to others. This helps to boost the attention paid and their memory of the topics including color theory.

    Those who teach painting classes, and other art lasses, may use them to lighten the mood in the spaces and to set the tone for the class. Painters will use them to share their passion and their families and friends will use them to share their appreciation for those they love. Others who are art critics or who work with critics will know the best painting jokes and puns, and will certainly use them not only in their reviews but also when talking to their coworkers.

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