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Senior jokes 👴 in 2024

How many seniors does it take to play a game of cards? None, they’ll just end up falling asleep at the table.

Why do seniors always have a magnifying glass with them? So they can read the fine print on their pills.

What’s a senior’s favorite way to travel? On a senior citizen’s bus tour.

Why do seniors always have a sweater with them? They’re always prepared for any change in temperature.

How do you know a senior is happy? They’re smiling while their teeth are still in their mouth.

Why do seniors always talk about the “good old days”? Because they were good and they were old.

What do you call a senior who’s always complaining? A grumpy old man or woman.

What do you call a senior who can’t remember anything? A forget-me-not.

How do you know a senior is a prankster? They put the TV remote in the fridge just to mess with their grandkids.

Why did the senior cross the road? To get to the other side of the century.

Why don’t seniors ever go on roller coasters? They don’t want to risk breaking a hip.

Why don’t seniors ever want to leave their homes? They don’t want to risk missing a rerun of Matlock.

What do you call a senior who’s always on the go? An Energizer Bunny on Viagra.

What do you call an elderly magician? An old wizard.

How many seniors does it take to tell a story? Just one, but it’ll probably take all day.

Why don’t seniors use computers? They’re afraid they’ll catch a virus.

Why don’t seniors ever watch the news? They’ve already seen it all before.

Why don’t seniors ever lend each other money? They don’t want to risk breaking even.

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