Brick jokes 🧱 in 2024

How do you turn a fruit into a vegetable?
– A brick to the back of his head should do it.

A drug addict calls the police to report something interesting
The police officer, interested, asks. “What is it?”
The addict responds. “Okay, I-”
The officer interrupts, quickly making sure they’re not on drugs “You’re sober right now, right?”
“Yes, this happened when I was sober too.”
All seems okay to this point. “Okay, go on.”>
“I saw an Italian plumber bump his head on a brick and grow three times his size!”
The officer pauses for a moment and mumbles to himself. “It’s the mushrooms.”

Little Johnny is in class…
and his teacher says; ‘Whoever answers my question right, can go home’. Johnny takes a brick from his bag and throws it through the window. ‘Who did that?!?!’ the teacher yelled. ‘I did sir, can I go home now?’

Sally is found dead within the next 5 minutes: why?
– She was hit by a brick falling from the sky.

First thing every morning I punch a brick wall as hard as I can
– Because your best days start with break fist.

How Kids Got Their Names
– 3 Kids are taking about how they got their names, and why their parents named as such.
The first one, a girl named “Rose” says “I was named Rose, because when I was born my parents dropped rose pedals on me.”
The second one, a boy named “Ash” says “I was named Ash, because wedge I was born my parents dropped ashes on me.”
The third one, a boy named “Brick” says “AHHHUUUUAUUAUUAAAA HUUAAA HURRRR”

Maria had 3 children, snowflake, sand, and brick.
– One day snowflake goes to her mom and asks her: Mom, why am I called snowflake? Then the mother replies: Because when you were born, a snowflake fell on your head. The next day goes Sand and asks: Mom, why am I called Sand? And the mother replies: Because when you were born, a small grain of sand fell on your head. The next day goes brick and asks: gyefagcxheufrhd

What does a fish say when it hits a brick wall?
– Dam

What weighs more, 200 lbs of bricks, or 200 lbs of feathers?
200 lbs of feathers,
– Because 200 lbs of bricks are just that, 200 lbs of feathers you have to carry the weight of what you did to all those birds.

What do you call stacks of free bricks left for rioters?
– Free Masonry!

A man walks by an insane asylum…
– An man walks by an insane asylum and hears the inmates gleefully shouting “21! 21! 21” As he gets closer he sees a hole in the brick wall which he approaches so he can peek in and see what’s going on. The inmates poke a stick through the hole, poking him in the eye, and yell “22! 22! 22!”

A little girl ask to her mom: “mom, why am I named Rosa?”
And her mom said: “because when you were born a rose fell on you head”
Her sister Daisy heatrs this and ask: “why is my name Daisy?”
And her mom said: because when you were born a daisy fell in your head”
When their brother Brick heard this, he ask: “GHTAKNDIALFJKQODK”

A brick wall fell on a man.
– He was in mortar danger

Someone threw part of a brick through my front window. The police couldn’t do anything though
– They said there wasn’t enough concrete evidence

Two brick masons are laying a wall when suddenly one of the bricks start to talk..
– When the masons start to talk to the brick he seems just like a regular guy telling the masons about his ambitions to go and get a education, so that he’s not forgotten like the rest of his brethren. Then he asks the masons to go with him and get an education too so that they won’t have to do this hard work anymore. When they hear this they are taken aback saying that they’ll have to take the rest of the day off to make a decision.

Coming back the next day the masons find the brick and start talking to it and after a while the brick asks if they’ve made a decision and the masons reply that they’re sorry but “we dont need no education” and though they like him “all and all you’re just another brick in the wall.”

My wife has been keeping secrets from me.
– I just built a fence and put down some paving. Turns out not only is she a master carpenter she’s also an expert brick layer. If only I had known earlier I could have sought her advice before I did the work. It would have saved me from making all the obvious mistakes she pointed out after the work was done.

I threw a brick in the air and pondered what would happen…
… and then it hit me.

A mother had three kids called Drop, Feather, and Brick
A mother had three kids called Drop, Feather, and Brick.
Perplexed, the first kid asks his mother “Mom, why did you named me Drop?”
And she says: “Because when you were born, a little drop fell in your head…”
The second kid asks: “Mom, why did you named me Feather?”
She answers: “Because when you were born, a feather fell in your head…”
Finally, the third kid says: “GUhhhGaahh *loud noises* HUEHUE”
Sorry guys