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Brick jokes 🧱 in 2023

How do you turn a fruit into a vegetable?
– A brick to the back of his head should do it.

A drug addict calls the police to report something interesting
The police officer, interested, asks. “What is it?”
The addict responds. “Okay, I-”
The officer interrupts, quickly making sure they’re not on drugs “You’re sober right now, right?”
“Yes, this happened when I was sober too.”
All seems okay to this point. “Okay, go on.”>
“I saw an Italian plumber bump his head on a brick and grow three times his size!”
The officer pauses for a moment and mumbles to himself. “It’s the mushrooms.”

Little Johnny is in class…
and his teacher says; ‘Whoever answers my question right, can go home’. Johnny takes a brick from his bag and throws it through the window. ‘Who did that?!?!’ the teacher yelled. ‘I did sir, can I go home now?’

Someone threw a piece of a brick through my window last night
– The police aren’t helping because there isn’t enough concrete evidence.

Bricks have a frustrating life.
– They’re hard all the time, but only get laid once.

What’s the difference between a brick and a red velvet cake?
– Not much, if we’re going off my mother-in-law’s recipe.

Which is heavier, 200 pounds of brick, or 200 pounds of feather?
– The feathers, because 200 pounds of bricks is just 200 pounds of bricks, but with the feathers, you also have to carry the weight of what you did to those poor birds.

Four men are at a bar bragging about how successful their sons are
– One says”my son is a successful brick layer and he bought his friend a Lamborghini just because”…the second man says”my friend is a successful real estate agent and he bought his friend a yacht just because”the third man says”my son is a great lawyer and he bought his friend a mansion just because”….their was a minute of silence and the second man asks the fourth man what his son does …the fourth man replies”he’s a gay stripper”..the third man says”oh you must be ashamed I’m sorry”which the fourth man says”not really his three boyfriends bought him a Lamborghini,a yacht,and a mansion just because”

What are four steps to putting a giraffe in a refrigerator?
– Open door, take elephant out of refrigerator, put giraffe in refrigerator, close door.

When I passed through Nevada, all i saw were ho’s. Then in Utah, I didnt see as many, but there were quite a few ho’s if you looked. When I left Salt Lake City, the truth hit me like a brick when I crossed the border…
– Idaho

A better blonde joke
– What is the difference between a brick and a blonde? If you lay a brick it doesn’t follow you home.

There was a lady with 3 sons, named Rain, Snow and Brick
– Rain asked his mom, Why is my name ‘Rain’?
Because a raindrop fell on your head when you were born.
Then Snow asked his mom, Why is my name ‘Snow’?
Because a snowflake fell on your head when you were born.
Then Brick asked his mom, NYANYANYANYA

Bricks are the happiest construction materials.
– They’re always getting laid.

What did the brick do after he was fired?
– Got a job in construction.
(Hopefully original am open to feedback)

I got T-boned by a construction delivery truck the other day.
– It came down like a ton of bricks.

I sexually identify as a brick.
– I’m always hard and I’ve only been laid once.

What does your mom and a brick have in common?
– They’ll both be getting laid by Mexicans later.

Why did the second-rate toy plastic brick maker become obsessed?
– Because he just couldn’t LEGO.

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