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Pregnancy jokes 🤰👶 in 2024

What’s common between hide and seek, and an unintentional pregnancy?
– Ready or not, here I come!

What do a pregnant woman and a burned cake have in common?
– You should’ve taken it out earlier.

If you eat a pregnant girl’s food…
– You’re required to have the baby for her.

“That first pregnancy is a long sea journey to a country where you don’t know the language, where land is in sight for such a long time that after a while it’s just the horizon — and then one day, birds wheel over that dark shape and it’s suddenly close, and all you can do is hope like hell that you’ve had the right shots.” — Emily Perkins

Is there any reason for me to be in the delivery room while my wife is in labor?
– Not unless the word “alimony” means anything to you.

How will I know if my puking is morning sickness or the flu?
– If it’s the flu, you’ll get better.

What’s better than eating for two while pregnant?
– Shopping for two.

“You don’t look so hot.”

“Adam and Eve had many advantages, but the principal one was that they escaped teething.”

How to ensure your baby is a Shrek fan?
– Play All-Star by Smashmouth all day, every day while your wife slowly goes crazy.

What should a joke have in common with a pregnancy?
– A good delivery.

What is the most reliable method to determine a baby’s sex?
– Childbirth.

Approach with caution.

Screaming out “BOOM PREGNANT!” during sex is never as funny as you think it will be

What is the most reliable way to determine the baby’s sex?
– Childbirth

How many days are there in a month?
– Each month has an average of 30 to 31 days, except the last month of pregnancy, which has 5,489,234.

How will I know if my vomiting is morning sickness or the flu?
– If it’s the flu, you’ll get better.

“Of course I can do this. I’m pregnant, not brain-damaged. My condition doesn’t change my personality.” an

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