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Octopus Jokes 🐙 in 2023

Why is the octopus such a good cook?
– Because he’s a chef-alopod!

What do you call an octopus with a hat?…
– An octopus with a hat of course.

Why is the octopus the most popular animal?
– Because it’s tenta-cool!

Why did the octopus beat the shark in a fight?…
– Because the octopus was well armed.

I heard on the news that the police were looking for a runaway octopus
– They said he was armed and dangerous

What story do octopus parents read to their kids?…
– Octopuss in boots.

What type of keyboard does an octopus prefer to use?
– Sqwerty!

How do young fish get to school?…
– By octobus.

What did the octopus say to it’s sweetheart?…
– You octopi my heart.

What is the biggest danger for a baby octopus?…
– Squid-nappers!

What’s a baby octopus’s favourite story?
– Octo-puss in boots!

Where does the octopus go to get an operation done?
– To the sturgeon!

What would be good about crossing a turkey with an octopus?…
– Everyone would get a drumstick on Thanksgiving

I had to take my pet octopus to the vet yesterday.
– Oh, don’t worry, he’s okay now. But the vet charged me six quid.

What do you get if you cross an octopus and a frog?…
– A croak-topus!

What did the octopus say to his girlfriend at the Beatles concert?
– I wanna hold your hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand…

How do you know if an octopus is alive?…
– You check its octo-pulse!

Why is an octopus always positive?…
– Because it always sees the octo-plus side of things!

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