Coronavirus Jokes in 2021

Being quarantined with a talkative childโ€ฆ
-is like having an insane parrot glued to your shoulder

Still no toilet paper in the stores.
-Theyโ€™re wiped out and youโ€™re shit out of luck.

Knock Knock! Whoโ€™s there? Etch
-Ech Who? Bless You!

Since weโ€™re all in quarantineโ€ฆ
– I guess weโ€™ll be making only inside jokes from now on.

My mom always told me I wouldnโ€™t accomplish anything by lying in bed all day.
-But look at me now, ma! Iโ€™m saving the world!

Has anyone else’s gardening skills improved during this quarantine like mine have?
-I planted myself on my couch at the beginning of March and I’ve grown significantly since.

How did the health experts lie? They said a mask and gloves was enough to go to the grocery store.
-When I got there, everyone else had clothes on.

To bรธsser elsker i parken om natten. Det er mรธrkt som i graven, og de siger til hinanden:

โ€“ โ€œJeg elsker dig.โ€

โ€“ โ€œJeg elsker ogsรฅ dig.โ€

โ€“ โ€œDu er fantastisk.โ€

โ€“ โ€œDet er du ogsรฅ.โ€

โ€“ โ€œLad os altid mรธdes her igen.โ€

โ€“ โ€œJa, hver dag โ€“ jeg bor i Kรธbenhavn.โ€

โ€“ โ€œJeg ogsรฅ. I Voldgadeโ€ฆโ€

โ€“ โ€œUtroligt, det gรธr jeg ogsรฅ ?!? I nummer 150โ€

โ€“ โ€œDet er ikke muligt โ€“ det gรธr jeg ogsรฅโ€ฆ!?!

โ€“ โ€œPalle..?โ€

โ€“ โ€œFar..?โ€

Why didnโ€™t the sick guy get the joke?
-It flu over his head.

After years of wanting to thoroughly clean my houseโ€ฆ
-but lacking the time, this week I discovered that wasnโ€™t the reason.

Y’all know what the best part of this quarantine is?
-Several months of no school shootings.

You know what theyโ€™re saying about 2020.
– It went viral faster than anyone thought it would.


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