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Morning Jokes 🌄 in 2024

I had problems milking my cow one morning.
– It was an udder failure.

What did the woman say before telling jokes on ‘early mornings’?
– “You people up for it?”

What would you say if your dad asks you how the breakfast waffles he made were?
– I’d say, “they weren’t w-awful.”

What did Tom say when his wife asked him to cook some breakfast?
– “Fine, I’ll cook some pancakes,” he said flippantly.

How did the man burn 800 calories in the morning easily?
– He forgot his pizza inside his oven.

What does Iron Man say every morning when he stands in front of the magic mirror?
– He says, “Mirror, mirror on my wall, who is the ferrous of us all?”

What would you do if you got up in the morning, ran around the blocks a few times and got tired?
– I’d pick up the blocks and put them back in my brother’s toy box.

How do the crazy joggers go through any forest in the morning?
– They take the psychopath.

I didn’t have any toast this morning, and I’m very angry about it.
– I think I might be lack toast intolerant.

Knock! Knock!

– Who’s there?

– Dew.

– Dew who?

– Dew wanna go jogging tomorrow morning?

This is a poem my younger sister when she was three, recited to a crowd and I will never forget it. It is very short though.

– Good night, sleep tight, wake up bright in the morning light, to do what’s right, with all your might.

How did Moses make coffee in the morning?
– He-brewed it.

Why does Thanos eat cereal in the morning at breakfast?
– Because it’s a part of a well-balanced breakfast.

On my way to work this morning a bird decided to make its home on top of my head. I went to call someone for help but my phone had run out of power
– I’m now under a nest without charge

Have you heard about the Vicks VapoRub truck that overturned on the freeway in the morning the other day?
– Well, there certainly wasn’t any congestion for the next 7-8 hours.

What happened to the guy that accidentally made his morning coffee with some Red Bull instead of with water?
– He got halfway to his work before he realized he had forgotten his car.

What do you say when someone compliments the eggs you cooked for breakfast?
– “Well, I’m an eggspert.”

I ran 3 miles this morning
– Finally I turned around and said, “here lady, just take your purse.”

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