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Anniversary jokes 💝🥂 in 2022

Keep your eyes wide open before marriage, half shut afterwards.

Why did the bee decide to get married?
– Because he found his honey.

The deer couple held an event to celebrate five years of deer-votion.

My head chef had his 10 year anniversary in work today. I put some salt and pepper on him.
– He’s a seasoned professional

Why did the man give his wife a picture of him in pistachio?
– Because that was him in a nutshell.

It’s our wedding anniversary today. My wife and I have been happily married for two years now.
– 1995 and 2009.

My wife was giving a speech at her parents’ wedding anniversary, and my phone battery ran out in the middle of recording it.
– Now I’ll never hear the end of it.

My wife got me flowers for our anniversary and surprised me.
– She really rose to the occasion.

Grooms, once you get married remember that when you have a discussion with your future wife, always get the last two words in:
– “Yes, dear.”

I bought my girlfriend a fridge for our anniversary…
– I know it wasn’t a great gift, but I loved seeing her face light up when she opened it.

Why are husbands always excited about anniversary trips?
– Because these are trips of a wife-time.

My battery died when I was recording my wife giving a toast at her parents’ 50th wedding anniversary.
– Now I’m never going to hear the end of it.

What did Cinderella say when her photos did not show up?
– Someday my prints will come!

As you may know, we have approached the 10th anniversary on the death of Michael Jackson…
– I think we should pause and think of all those he’s touched.

Who would throw the best wedding reception for the guests?
– The cellphones.

Our anniversary is coming up, so my wife told me that she would be happy as long as I get her something with a lot of diamonds in it.
– She’s going to love this pack of playing cards.

Just listen up while I tell you about this couple, and I’ll make it seem like the shortest 45 minutes of your life

Why did the Nasa couple’s marriage work out so well?
– Because they gave each other much-needed space.

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