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Running jokes 🏃‍♀️ in 2024

Why did the track runner not get out of bed?
– He was fast asleep.

What are the mediocre new jogging machines at the gym called?
– Run of the mill.

“Runner’s logic: I’m tired. Let me go for a run.”

Why do midgets laugh when they run?
– Because the grass tickles their balls.

Why did the podiatrist make his patients wait a long time before calling them?
– Because time is supposed to heel all wounds.

Why did the vegetarians stop doing cross country runs?
– Because they didn’t like meets.

“There are many challenges to long distance running,
– but one of the greatest is the question of where to put one’s house keys.”

“Running makes me feel less like I want to kill people.”

What’s the difference between Stephen Hawking and the computer he’s hooked up to?
– The computer runs.

Why did the trainer make the runner workout in the sun?
– He wants him to feel the burn.

Why didn’t the personal trainer pay his rent?
– Because he was squatting.

“It is true that speed kills. In distance running,
– it kills anyone who does not have it.”

Confucius say, man who runs behind car will get exhausted,
– but man who runs in front of car will get tired.

Why is a marathon race 26.2 miles long?
– Read Psalm 26:2 of David: “Test me, o Lord, and try me / examine my heart and my mind”.

How did the son know that his dad was a dedicated runner?
– He had more miles on his treadmill than on his car.

Why did the scared new gym trainer quit his new job at the gym?
– He handed in his two weak notice.

“Run like there’s a hot guy in front of you and a creepy one behind you.”

Why did the chicken run across the road?
– There was a car coming.

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