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Golf Jokes 🏌️‍♂️ in 2023

“I once played a course that was so tough, I lost two balls in the ball washer!”

Golf! You hit down to make the ball go up.
– You swing left and the ball goes right. The lowest score wins. And on top of that, the winner buys the drinks.

What is a golfer’s favorite bird?
– Any birdie will do.

What are a golfer’s favorite flowers?
– Fore-get Me Nots.

Flying on a golf-stream jet

Why didn’t the golfer get his homework done?
– He was puttering around.

What do golfers do on their days off?
– Putter around.

Where do ghouls and ghosts play their golf?
– On a golf corpse.

Golf is a game in which the slowest people in the world are those in front of you, and the fastest are those behind.

A classic: Why do golfers always carry a spare pair of trousers with them?
– In case they get a hole in one.

Golf’s a hard game to figure. One day you’ll go out and slice it and shank it, hit into all the traps, and miss every green. The next day you go out and, for no reason at all, you really stink.

What did the driver yell at the golf cart that cut him off?
– Kiss my putt.

A golfer is standing at a tee overlooking a river.
– He sees a couple of fishermen and says to his partner, “Look at those two idiots fishing in the rain.”

Player: I made a 10 on hole 4 today!
– Friend: how on earth did you manage that?
– Player: I chipped in from the bunker!

In primitive society, when native tribes beat the ground with clubs and yelled, it was called witchcraft; today, in civilized society, it is called golf.

Mulligan: Invented by an Irishman who wanted to hit one more 20-yard grounder.

What should you do if your round of golf is interrupted by a lightning storm?
– Walk around holding your 1-iron above your head, because even Mother Nature can’t hit a 1-iron.

What did Nat King Cole sing after he won a round of golf?
– Un-fore-gettable, in every way.

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