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Periodic table jokes 🧪⚗️🧑‍🔬☣ in 2023

What’s another name for the Periodic Table of elements?
– The atoms family.

How do you track the reproductive cycle of pachyderms?
– With the Periodic Table of Elephants.

The chemist had so much fun writing periodic table jokes, he was in his element.

Are you made out of beryllium, uranium, and titanium?
– Cause you’re a BeUTi!

What is uranium + fluorine + oxygen? UFO.

What did the scientist say when he found two helium atoms?
– “He-He!”
(It’s ok I know where the door is, bye)

The skydiving instructor was going through the question and answer period with his new students
– one of them asked the usual question always asked: “If our chute doesn’t open; and the reserve doesn’t open, how long would we have till we hit the ground?”

The jump master looked at him and in perfect deadpan answered: “The rest of your life.”

I auditioned for the lead role on a play of the periodic table but Actinium ended up getting it.

What did the chemist say to motivate his team?

What did the chemist do when he cut his leg?
– He put his neon (knee on) a table to bandage it up.

What is the show cesium and iodine love watching together?
– CsI.

What did the rest of the periodic table say as gold went home at the end of the day?
– Au revoir!

When there was a fire, the elements said that Arsenic started the fire.

I wanted to post something here for National Periodic Table Day but I’m out of my element.

What does a metal miner write home in a letter to his girlfriend?
– I am zincing of you!

What is the chemical formula for sea water?
– CH2O.

Call me the 7th noble gas.
– Cuz I’m Og.

(yay for the completion of the 7th row of the periodic table!)

The child wanted to go to the amusement park at midnight. His father arranged a bunch of iron in a circle and called out: “Here’s a Ferrous Wheel.”

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