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Nerdy jokes 🤓 in 2024

When I was a kid, my English teacher looked my way and said: “Name two pronouns.”
– I said, “Who, me?”

I used to be able to recite the English alphabet before we met.
– Now, I can’t get past “u.”

What company makes Nerds?
– Your mom.

What do Wagner’s musical works and his debts have in common?
– They both never resolve.

Einstein, Newton, and Pascal playing hide and seek
– Einstein, Newton, and Pascal are playing hide and seek. It’s einstein’s turn to count. Pascal runs away and hides under some bushes.
– Newton draws a large box in the dirt and stands inside it.
– Einstein finishes counting, sees Newton and declares “Aha! Newton, I found you!”
– Newton replies “No, you found one Newton per square meter. You found Pascal.”

My nerdy friend just got a PhD on the history of palindromes.
– We now call him Dr. Awkward.

Why don’t elephants use computers?
– Because they’re afraid of the mouse

How does a tree use a computer?
– It logs on

Why did the monkeys share an Amazon account?
– They were Prime mates

Are you into science?
– Because I lab you so much!

Yes, I have an iPhone in my pocket. Also,
– I’m glad to see you.

Attention Nerds!
– It would be so much easier if humans came with an error message just like computers do.
Imagine sitting in a restaurant and failing miserably at flirting with the waitress.
“Warning! Error establishing connection with the Server”

Why did the bear dissolve in water?
– It was polar

Your body must be made of oxygen and neon,
– because you are the One.

Jokes that nerds tell
– I would tell you a NTP joke, but I don’t have the time.
Got any more

You’re sweeter than fructose.

How about we go back to my place and form a covalent bond?

Why do a lot of math nerds wear glasses?
– It helps with division.

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