Silly jokes in 2021

What do you get from a pampered cow?
-Spoiled milk.

I tried to win a suntanning competition.
-But all I got was bronze.

Why did the giraffe get such bad grades?
-He always had his head stuck in the clouds.

Did you hear about the first restaurant to open on the moon?
-It had great food, but no atmosphere.

Want to hear a joke about a roof?
– The first oneโ€™s on the house.

How do you make a tissue dance?
-Put a little boogie in it.

What happened when a faucet, a tomato, and some lettuce ran a race together?
-The lettuce was ahead, the faucet was running, and the tomato was trying to ketchup.

I entered ten puns in a contest to see which would win.
– No pun in ten did.

What do you get when you cross a dyslexic, an insomniac, and an agnostic?
-Someone who lays awake at night wondering if thereโ€™s a dog.

What do you call a snail aboard a ship?
-A snailor.

How does NASA organize a party?
-They planet.

George Clooney, Leonardo DiCaprio, and Matthew McConaughey get together to make a movie.
-Clooney says, โ€œIโ€™ll direct.โ€

DiCaprio says, โ€œIโ€™ll act.โ€

McConaughey says, โ€œIโ€™ll write, Iโ€™ll write, Iโ€™ll write.โ€

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