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Silly jokes in 2024

How does NASA organize a party?
-They planet.

Why are frogs always so happy?
-They eat whatever bugs them.

What does a house wear?
-Address!

What do you call a dog with no legs?
-It doesn’t matter, it’s not going to come anyway.

Why is Peter Pan always flying?
-Because he Neverlands. (I love this joke because it never grows old.)

What gets wetter the more it dries?
-A towel.

Did you hear about the painter who was hospitalized?
-The doctors say it was due to too many strokes.

Did you hear about the carrot detective?
-He always got to the root of every case.

When does a joke become a ‘dad’ joke?
-When it becomes apparent.

You know why you never see elephants hiding up in trees?
-Because they’re really good at it.

Where do you find a cow with no legs?
-Right where you left it.

The first rule of the Alzheimer’s club is…
-Wait, where are we again?

Can a kangaroo jump higher than the Empire State Building?
-Of course! The Empire State Building can’t jump.

I got a new job last week as the new top dog at Old MacDonald’s farm.
-I’m the new C-I-E-I-O.

There’s a fine line between a numerator and a denominator.
-(…Only a fraction of people will get this clean joke.)

Why aren’t koalas considered bears?
-They don’t have the right koala-fications.

Why are crabs so bad at sharing?
-Because they’re all shellfish.

What washes up on very small beaches?
-Micro-waves

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