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History jokes 📜 in 2024

Which English royal family was the smartest?
– The Tudors!

Q: Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?
– A: At the bottom!

What do you call a Medieval knight who’s always sure of himself?
– Sir Tainly!

You do not want to know the history behind the railroad
– because it is so underground.

The biggest irony in the world’s history is that the Russian alphabet has no letters in lowercase.
– It is all Capitalization.

“We must all hang together or assuredly we shall all hang separately.”

What was the most popular kids’ movie in Ancient Greece?
– Troy Story!

What do the early European settlers in America have in common with ants?
– They both lived in colonies!

England is the wettest country because many monarchs reigned there for many years.

Catherine and Peter performed great in ‘Dancing with the Tsar’last night.
– But Ivan was terrible.

“We Polked You in ’44, We Shall Pierce You in ‘52”

What do you call a vegan Viking?
– A Norvegan!

What does the Statue of Liberty stand for?
– Because it can’t sit down!

When indoor toilets were introduced in Britain,
– it was considered to be a revo-loo-tionary move.

When I asked my Teacher in History class if she could tell us more about Napoleon’s origin,
– she replied,”‘Course I can!”

Q: What did Caesar say to Cleopatra?
– A: Toga-ether we can rule the world

What did Richard III say when someone asked to build a car park in Leicester?
– “Over my dead body!”

When Julius Ceasar got defeated by Brutus in ‘Battleship,
– ‘ he said, “A2 Brute?”

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