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History jokes 📜 in 2022

What do you call a vegan Viking?
– A Norvegan!

What does the Statue of Liberty stand for?
– Because it can’t sit down!

When indoor toilets were introduced in Britain,
– it was considered to be a revo-loo-tionary move.

When I asked my Teacher in History class if she could tell us more about Napoleon’s origin,
– she replied,”‘Course I can!”

Q: What did Caesar say to Cleopatra?
– A: Toga-ether we can rule the world

What did Richard III say when someone asked to build a car park in Leicester?
– “Over my dead body!”

When Julius Ceasar got defeated by Brutus in ‘Battleship,
– ‘ he said, “A2 Brute?”

The paper my student wrote on Tsar Ivan was so bad,
– it was tearable.

“Ask for me tomorrow, and you’ll find me a grave man.”

What was the Romans’ greatest achievement?
– Learning to speak Latin!

Why did the Pilgrims sail to America?
– It was too far to swim!

Vikings used to send private messages using the Norse code.

When one is Russian for industrialization,
– there is no time for Stalin.

“Land-On Washington”

There was once a famous Viking called Rudolph the Red.
– One day, he looked outside and asked his wife to bring the washing in because it looked like it was going to be a wet day.
– His wife asked, “what makes you say that?”
– The Viking replied, “Rudolph the Red knows rain, dear.”

Why aren’t you doing well in history class at school?
– Because the history teacher keeps on asking me about things that happened years before I was born!

During the cold war all the countries involved went into hibernation

One fundamental lesson our teacher has taught us in History class while talking about the Civil War was never to take victory for Grant-ed.

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