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Fruit jokes 🍊🍋🍓🥝 in 2023

What did the pitted fruit say when he got in a fight?
– You want a peach of me?!

Did you hear the one about the fruit salad?
– A-pear-antly not.

What do you get when you put an iPhone in a blender?
– Apple juice!

Why did the lemon go to the doctor?
– He was feeling sour!

What type of fruit always has a wedding?
– Cantaloupe

I blueberry much love you.

Hey drop me a lime!

How many marmalade sandwiches did Paddington Bear eat?
– None, he’s already stuffed!

What did the fruit say when he was surprised for his birthday?
– Wow… I’m s-peach-less!

What do you call someone who steals a fruit drink?
– A smoothie criminal.

And they all lived apple-y ever after.

Eat, drink, and be cherry.

What was Prince’s favourite dessert?
– Raspberry sorbet!

My sister thought she was soo smart, she said the only vegetable/fruit that can make her cry is a onion
– So I threw a coconut at her

Time flies like an arrow.
– Fruit flies like a banana.

I’ve been pine-ing for you.

What do you get when you cross apple pie with a Christmas tree?
– Pineapple pie!

What does a lemon say when it wants a hug?
– Give us a squeeze!

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