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Sleep jokes 💤🛌 in 2023

What is “relative to a short sleep?”
A napkin.

Do you know why mountains are always tired?
– Because they don’t Everest.

What did Papa cow read to the baby cow before going to bed?
– Dairy tales.

Doctor:I’ve found a great new drug that can help you with your sleeping problem.
Patient:Great, how often do I have to take it ?
Doctor:Every two hours.

What do you call it when you dream in color?
– A pigment of your imagination.

I don’t sleep with dates on the 2, 3, 5, 7, 11, or 13th date
– It’s my prime dating rule

What do you call a very sleepy egg?
– Eggs-hausted.

Why is it so tiring to fix a toilet?
– Because the work is draining.

Why won’t I tell you about my dream that has a lion, a witch, and a wardrobe?
– Because it is Narnia business.

What do you call it when a king and queen size mattress has a baby?
– An heir mattress.

Why did the girl take a ruler with her to bed?
– To see how long she sleeps.

You should never take a sleeping pill and a laxative at the same time.
– But if you do, you will sleep like a baby.

Do you know another word for a sleeping bag?
– It’s a nap-sack!

Why is insomnia considered to be illegal in many places?
– Because it amounts to resisting a-rest.

Why do keyboards never sleep?
– Because they have two shifts.

A husband was sleeping next to his blind wife…
He woke up feeling his wife’s hands touching all over his face. Annoyed he asked, “What are you doing?”
In a sweet voice she said, “I just love watching you sleep.”

What happens to a man who runs behind a car?
– He gets exhausted.

Do you know where all the fish fell asleep?
– On the seabed.

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