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Work jokes in 2024

The Man Who Created Autocorrect Has Died. Restaurant In Peace.

Hey Boss, I hung a picture up on the wall the other day.
– Some would say that I nailed it.

What’s the world’s saddest pizza?
– A pepperlonely.

What’s the cover song of Brexit?
– We Will We Will Rock EU

Me: How do I unsubscribe so I don’t get your emails any more?
– Boss: What?

I’m a project manager and I can’t even manage my own room.

What days are the strongest? Saturday and Sunday.
– The rest are weakdays.

Don’t trust atoms.
– They make up everything!

Everyone started putting their names on their food.
– I saw it today while I was eating a sandwich named Mark.

What do you call a priest’s persona?
– His altar ego.

Why did the orange lose the race?
– It ran out of juice.

One man’s trash is another man’s treasure.
– Wonderful saying, horrible way to find out you were adopted.

I used to work for a paper business.
– But then it folded.

Cleaning mirrors is a job I could really see myself doing.

My memory has gotten so bad it has actually caused me to lose my job. I’m still employed.
– I just can’t remember where.

How do you cut the sea?
– With a seesaw.

Old salespeople never die.
– They just check out.

I ran into a statistic that says that 42 percent of statistics are made up!

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