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Bug jokes ๐ŸฆŸ in 2023

A moth flew into my entrance door today and fell to the ground.
– I was able to resurrect him using mouth to moth breathing techniques.

I opened a nightclub and hired some small insects to discourage shady people from entering.
– The insects were my deter ants.

Yesterday, I saw an ant-elope.
– It was supposed to be the first insect wedding that I attended.

What game do insects like to play the most?
– Cricket.

What goes 99-clonk, 99-clonk, 99-clonk?
– A centipede with a wooden leg!

What goes โ€œsnap, crackle and popโ€?
– A firefly with a short circuit!

In ancient Egypt, if you carried a stinging insect in your hand, you were considered very attractive.
– That’s because beauty was always in the eye of the beeholder.

A boy threw a chunk of butter out of his window.
– He said he just wanted to see a butter fly.

What are the pillars of the insectโ€™s temples called?
– Cater-pillars.

What is green and can jump a mile in a minute?
– A grasshopper with hiccups!

My mom said my Pawpaw would say this joke all the time in the car. They’d be driving along and a bug would splat against the windshield and he’d say…
– “I bet he doesn’t have the guts to do that again.”

Today I saw a big flying insect coughing up blood.
– Well, I think it ending up joining the tuberculocust community.

What would a blood sucking insect be called if it learned Latin?
– It would be called a Roman-tic.

What would we call a fly without its wings?
– A walk.

What is the difference between a flea bitten dog and a bored visitor?
– Ones going to itch and the other is itching to go!

All the ants of the world have their own city, and it’s called ‘Antlantic City’.

This morning, my bedside lamp became a butterfly.
– That’s the last time I’m buying a cheap larva lamp.

Where do insects go for fruit shopping?
– Applebeeโ€™s.

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