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Bone jokes 🦴💀 in 2024

Why didn’t the skeleton eat spicy food?
– He didn’t have the stomach for it.

Did you hear that NASA found bones on the moon?
– The cow didn’t make it.

What unit of measurement do you use to weigh bones?
– Skele tons!
– Stay spooky my dudes

What do you call a monk who walks everywhere in bare feet, has poor bone density and really bad breath?
– A super-calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis.

What do you need for a movie about broken bones?
– An awesome cast

How is a lesbian like a camel?
– Their hump has no bone.

The price of smartphones are getting way too ridiculous
– If I fall and hear something crack, I’m hoping it’s a bone

Don’t break anybody’s heart; they only have 1.
– Break their bones; they have 206.

I could tell you a joke about bones…
– But some of you may not find it very humerus

Just had an operation on my funny bone….
– Doctor said I’ll be in stitches for 2 weeks.

Why did the skeleton pupil stay late at school?
– He was boning up for his exams!

There are 27 bones in the human hand…
– and 28 when I’m lonely.

What does a skeleton use to call his friends?
– A tele-bone.

How did the skeleton know it was going to rain?
– It could feel it in it’s bones.

I suffered a broken collar bone, concussion and some minor bruising when I fell asleep at the wheel.
– Got kicked out of pottery class too.

My wife accidentally hit a wall with her elbow and said “Ow! That was my not-funny bone!”
– I disagreed. It was humerus.

I went to an archaeologist’s party where we were excavating a lower leg bone.
– It was quite the shindig.

What do women and KFC have in common?
– Once your done with the legs and thighs you have a greasy box to stick your bone in.

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