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Bone jokes 🦴💀 in 2024

Did you hear that NASA found bones on the moon?
– The cow didn’t make it.

Why didn’t the skeleton eat spicy food?
– He didn’t have the stomach for it.

What do you call a monk who walks everywhere in bare feet, has poor bone density and really bad breath?
– A super-calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis.

What unit of measurement do you use to weigh bones?
– Skele tons!
– Stay spooky my dudes

How is a lesbian like a camel?
– Their hump has no bone.

The price of smartphones are getting way too ridiculous
– If I fall and hear something crack, I’m hoping it’s a bone

Don’t break anybody’s heart; they only have 1.
– Break their bones; they have 206.

I could tell you a joke about bones…
– But some of you may not find it very humerus

What do you need for a movie about broken bones?
– An awesome cast

What does a skeleton use to call his friends?
– A tele-bone.

How did the skeleton know it was going to rain?
– It could feel it in it’s bones.

Just had an operation on my funny bone….
– Doctor said I’ll be in stitches for 2 weeks.

Why did the skeleton pupil stay late at school?
– He was boning up for his exams!

There are 27 bones in the human hand…
– and 28 when I’m lonely.

Why did the skeleton go to the dance?
– To see the boogie man.

How much does a pile of bones weigh?
– It must weigh a skele-ton!

To Thrive in life, you need 3 bones.
– A Wish Bone, A Back Bone and a Funny Bone.

I wish my wife looked at me the way my dog does.
– You know, waist-high with a bone in her mouth.

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