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Atom jokes ⚛ in 2023

What did the atom say when it kept losing electrons?
– I really need to keep an ion them.

An atom walks into a bar…
and orders a drink. The barman makes the drink and hands it over. The atom just sits there and sighs. “Why so down?” the barman asks. “Iv’e lost an electron.” the atom answers. “Are you sure?” the barman asks. “I’m positive.”

what do you get if you eat a bomb?
– Atomic ache.

Scientists Have Captured the Sound One Atom Makes and what did the atom say?
– “Does it really matter we make up everything.”

Two atoms walk into a bar.
The first one turns to the other and says “I think I’ve lost an electron!”

The second one goes “Are you sure?”

To which the first one replies “I’m positive.”

Why are atoms selfish?
– Because they’re all that matter!

…Courtesy of my witty wife after my 11 year old asked the “Why should you never trust atoms? – because they make up everything” joke.

I thought surely the joke already existed, but I couldn’t find it anywhere. Doesn’t entirely work, but it got a laugh out of me!

The Atom and the Cation
The Atom says to the Cation, “who’s in charge around here?”

Cation: “I am!”

Atom: “Are you sure?”

Cation: “I’m positive!”

What do you call an acid with an attitude?

What kind of fish is made up of only two sodium atoms?
– 2Na.

My friends tried to convince me I was a chemical element with the atomic number 82.
– Thankfully, I’m not so easily lead.

What did one atom say to the other?
Thank you for your help in this matter!

What did the chlorine atom say to the sodium atom?
– I’ve got my ion you.

One atom bumped into another atom,
And said, “hey I just lost an electron!”

“Are you sure?” Asks the other atom.

“Yes, I’m positive!”

Two atoms are walking down the street and they run into each other.
One says to the other, “Are you all right?”

“No, I lost an electron.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yeah, I’m positive.”

Lose an electron?
– Gotta keep an ion it.

A chemist walks into a bar and says to the bartender, “Tonight all drinks are on me!”

The bartender says to him, “You must’ve had a good day today, what happened?”

“I finally found a way to make a stable molecule from a barium atom, two sodium atoms, and a sulfur atom!” the chemist proudly replies.

“Wow,” says the bartender, “That’s BaNaNaS!”

An atom loses an electron…
– It says, “man, I really gotta keep an ion them.”

A Hydrogen atom suddenly exclaimed: “I think I just lost my electron!”
“Are you sure?” Asked its friend,
“Yes” replied the first, “I’m positive.”

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