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Stupid jokes in 2025

What do you call a hippie’s wife?
– A Mississippi!

Why did Batman and Robin quit going fishing together?
-Because Robin ate all the worms!

What do you call a magician dog?
– A labracadabrador.

Why don’t crabs donate?
-Because they’re shellfish.

What do you call a man who can’t stand?
-Neil.

What did the blanket say as it fell off the bed?
– “Oh sheet!”

Why is Peter Pan always flying?
-He neverlands.

Why can’t you hear a Pterodactyl go to the bathroom?
-Because the pee is silent.

What do you call an empty can of Cheese Whiz?
– Cheese Was.

What did the little mountain say to the bigger mountain?
-Hi Cliff!

What day of the week do all fish dislike the most?
-Fryday.

How many tickles does it take to make an octopus laugh?
-Ten tickles.

Why do fish live in salt water?
-Because pepper makes them sneeze!

Why did the businessman invest in Smith & Wollensky?
-He wanted to stake his claim.

I just wrote a book on reverse psychology.
-Do not read it.

Cosmetic surgery used to be such a taboo subject.
-Now you can talk about Botox and nobody raises an eyebrow.

What did Mario say when he broke up with Princess Peach?
-“It’s not you, it’s a-me, Mario!”

What do you call a monkey that loves Doritos?
– A chipmunk!

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