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Mechanic jokes 👨‍🔧 in 2024

While driving home I saw my mechanic on the side of the road crying like a little baby.
– I don’t know exactly what happened but he must have had a serious breakdown

The new mechanic lost his job; they say he lacks fine motor skills.

Why did the mechanic go to visit an eye doctor?
– To get drops of blinker fluid for his eye.

Why was the jumper cable not allowed in public?
– Because he would start anything!

Why did the mechanic refuse to eat his lunch at the garage?
– Because it was full of car-bs.

What do you call a knife that is being used by a mechanic?
– Cutting edge technology.

The kid wanted to become a car mechanic, so he went to bring a starter kit!

Heard about the guy who was looking for punctures in the tires?
– He wanted to make sure he had avoided the fork in the road.

I brought my car to a mechanic and asked him, “Do you have any idea why my car is humming?”
– He replied, “Probably because it doesn’t know all the lyrics.”

How do you make an mechanical frog?
– You can’t use bolts, you have to use revets

What does an emotionally detached mechanic do with a bar hook-up?
– Nuts and bolts.

Why did the kid want to become an elevator mechanic?
– Because he enjoyed the ups and downs of his job.

Mechanics might disagree, but…
– …eyedrops are technically blinker fluid.

I asked a mechanic for a book on how to fix automatic gearboxes…
– But he only has manuals.

My mechanic tried to scam me because he didn’t think I knew about cars
– I took my car to get an oil change and they were like “would you like us to rotate your tires?” I was like “Ummm. I rotated them a bunch on the way over jackass!”

Which occasion is most crucial in a mechanic’s life?
– His ten-gear anniversary!

Heard about the new fuel-efficient green car?
– It’s not a hybrid.

Why did the mechanic have a disappointing fashion show?
– There was no time to change attire.

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