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Finance jokes 💰💸 in 2022

Why did the financial system collapse in ancient Egypt?
– Pyramid schemes.

What do you call an “inventory” of boats?
– Finished goods available for sail

An engineer major asks…
“How can we build this?”
A business major asks, “How can we finance this?”
– A liberal arts major asks, “Do you want fries with that?”

The teenager lost a contact lens while playing basketball in his driveway. After a brief, fruitless search, he gave up. His mother took up the cause and within minutes found the lens.

“How did you do that?” he asked.

“We weren’t looking for the same thing,” she explained. “You were looking for a small piece of plastic. I was looking for $150.”

How did the mortgage on the deserted island feel?
– A loan

I hear it’s a good time to buy real estate in Texas!
– The housing market is flooded.

I’m currently boycotting any company that sells items I can’t afford.

What kind of debt did the secret agent issue?
– A bond, James Bond.

What do you get when you combine Finland and France?
– Finance.

Did you hear about the man with a passion for accounting?
– Finance was his principal interest.

A hacker saw my financials
– He set up a go fund me.

Did you hear about the creditor who got bored?
– He lost interest

I met Greece’s finance minister, who was looking for help regarding the situation there.
– He asked me for my two cents.

Why can’t the car payment make any friends?
– Because they’re always “a loan”

What do you call dogs trying to establish an LLC?
– Creating their “beagle” structure

I’m devastated that my son has chosen a career in finance rather than taking over the family wheat farm.
– He’s going against the grain.

That awkward moment when you leave a store without buying anything and all you can think is “act natural, you’re innocent”.

Why was the banker bad at playing music?
– Because they only knew how to play a Treasury note

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