The finance industry spans several tasks and careers and there are many finance jokes for each of them. From accounting to banking and even stocks and bonds, people have been mixing humor with money since the industry formed. Any age can find suitable money jokes for their use.
Tip-jar humour in our local coffee shop: “Afraid of Change? Leave It Here.”
Why did the financial analyst give his daughter gifts today instead of waiting until Christmas?
– Because he understands “Present Value”
I’m so good at finance…
– Even my bank says my balance is outstanding.
I’m going to finance a theatrical production performed on a stage covered in pages from the dictionary.
– It will be a play on words.
If your name is on the building, you’re rich; if your name is on your desk, you’re middle-class; if your name is on your shirt, you’re poor.
How did the Marine pay for food on his business trip?
– He used his carpe per diem
My finances are ok right now.
– 0K* sorry.
I was in small-claims court when I listened in on the case of a woman who held a good job but still had trouble paying her bills on time. “Can’t you live within your income?” asked the judge. “No, Your Honor,” she said. “It’s all I can do to live within my credit.”
Did you hear about all the shared expenses going to Hawaii?
– It was their allo-cation
Bill Gates has often claimed how hard it is to give away 100 billion dollars.
– Then he discovered divorce.
‘I’m normally not one to brag about my financial skills but my credit card company calls me almost every day to inform me my balance is outstanding!
Did you hear about the new superhero, Accounts Payable Woman?
– She had superhuman li-abilities
My jam business failed.
– My finances got spread too thin.
Why should you never count your money while standing on an ant hill?
– You might finance in your pants!
Why did the financial system collapse in ancient Egypt?
– Pyramid schemes.
What do you call an “inventory” of boats?
– Finished goods available for sail
An engineer major asks…
“How can we build this?”
A business major asks, “How can we finance this?”
– A liberal arts major asks, “Do you want fries with that?”
The teenager lost a contact lens while playing basketball in his driveway. After a brief, fruitless search, he gave up. His mother took up the cause and within minutes found the lens.
“How did you do that?” he asked.
“We weren’t looking for the same thing,” she explained. “You were looking for a small piece of plastic. I was looking for $150.”
Accounting Jokes Accounting
is often seen as a dry and boring topic due to it’s involvement in numbers and math. There is a strong need for accountants and strong accounting skills in all businesses, and the accounting jokes
are sure to follow any accountant and any business owner. Through accounting all of the money that comes into any business or residence is accounted for, and all of the money that is spent or saved is tracked and reported. As proper accounting is needed for financial health, the funniest finance jokes may be those that address the accounting that is behind it. Clean finance jokes about accountants, bankers, and even lawyers, are all a way to share knowledge about the topics and find others to feel connected too as they struggle with or excel at the same topics.
Many accountants will have their top finance jokes that they use both at holidays with family and work functions. It is a way to make their job feel attainable and normal to others, and the top finance jokes are simple enough that everyone can enjoy them and understand them. More difficult accounting jokes may use harder terms, or include specific tasks that are not easily understood to other people, making these corny finance jokes less enjoyable to those outside of the industry.
Loans and Financing Jokes
A large part of finance is the financing branches. They offer loans and help raise capital for businesses and projects. Funny finance jokes are often intended to point out the constant flow of money and the need for there to always be more coming in. Interest jokes are also well used as interest rates fluctuate and change the chances and terms of any financing available.
Cheesy finance jokes point out how people will request financing or payments for almost anything. From furniture to clothing, cars and houses or businesses, there is some type of financing available. Hilarious finance jokes share the experiences of those who are searching for a way to make purchases or repairs and the difficulty or ease with which they are able to access the assistance they need. One liner finance jokes also refer to the people who are providing loans and forming the agreements and terms.
Top finance jokes can’t be discussed without addressing the banking jokes that go with them. Bankers have control over many aspects of people’s financial lives from their day to day checking and savings to their mortgages for homes and businesses, to cars and investments. Silly finance jokes may share opinions on people who have those jobs, whether they are trying to help people or causing damages instead, and how they choose that career. There is no end to the bank jokes, banking jokes, and banker jokes, regardless of the state of the economy. Stock Jokes Stocks are a popular way to invest money and they are often used in short finance jokes. They can be traded, sold, or bought on a daily basis and often form the main way that a large business raises capital and accesses financing for their next project. By using stocks anyone can make money on a successful purchase or loose money if a business fails, and there is always some risk and unknown factors involved. Stock jokes are very common and one of the ways that people deal with the stress of a job in the stock market or who do trade for themselves or others.
Each of these aspects of money and finance are connect yet separate, and those who hold these careers or work with them every day are sure to know the very best finance jokes. Even finance jokes for kids
can help to teach them about saving and investing, and teach them different terminology as they grow and need to manage their own household income and expenses.