The military is a collection of all the armed forces of a particular country (The army, navy, air-force, and other security branches). The military's main job is the provision of protection to the country’s citizens from internal and external attacks. There are still head-turning military jokes despite how serious their job sounds.
Air Force Fact:
-The only time you can have too much fuel is when you’re on fire.
How do you knock out a marine while he’s drinking water?
-Slam the toilet lid down on his head.
An ice cream cone and a slice of cheesecake joined the army. They eventually abandoned their fellow soldiers.
-They are now wanted for dessertion.
What do you call a 2nd lieutenant surrounded by PFCs?
Air Force pilot to a seaman: “You’re telling me that you’re in the Navy but can’t swim?”
-Seaman: “You’re in the Air Force. Can you fly?”
What’s the difference between God and an Air Force pilot?
-God doesn’t think he’s a fighter pilot.
What do you call a Marine with a head wound?
What’s the true meaning of Army?
– Aren’t Ready for Marines Yet.
As a group of soldiers stood in formation at an Army Base, the Drill Sergeant said, “All right! All you idiots fall out.”
-As the rest of the squad wandered away, one soldier remained at attention. The drill instructor walked over until he was eye-to-eye with him. The soldier smiled and said, “Sure were a lot of ’em, huh, sir?”
What’s the ideal cockpit crew? A dog and a pilot.
-The pilot is there to feed the dog. The dog is flying so that he can bite the pilot if he tries to touch anything.
Two fresh sailors were talking about assignments they would like to get.
-Sailor 1: “Someday I’d like to ride on a submarine.”
Sailor 2: “Not me! I wouldn’t set foot on any ship that sinks on purpose.”
Why does the Navy have Marines on their ships?
-Sheep are too obvious.
A soldier runs up a hill and around a corner before slamming into an officer.
-“Where do you think you’re going, son?”
“Sorry, Captain! It’s crazy out there and the firefight was so heavy. I got scared and tried to go AWOL.”
“Who you calling Captain? I’m a general!”
“Wow!” exclaimed the soldier. “I didn’t realize I’d run that far back.”
A general radios a colonel.
-“Got any smart majors?”
“Quite a few! Why?”
“Can you send some over? I need to move around some furniture.”
What’s the difference between a Navy aircrewman and an otter?
-The otter knows he’s not a seal.
Officer: Why weren’t you in your camouflage this morning?
-Soldier: “I was, sir.”
Officer: “Guess those tailors did a good job.”
How many guns do you need for a firefight?
-Two. One for us to shoot and one for the United States to sell to the enemy so he can shoot us back.
Which branch is the most patriotic?
– The Air Force because they are US AF.
Clean Military humor
Military humor is based on the military life stereotype. It portrays a vast range of characters and situations found in the armed forces. It makes use of cartoons, strips, exaggeration, jokes, parody, ridicule, sarcasm and comes in a wide array of tastes and culture. Military humor usually comes in the form of military jokes. The military also has its slang which is full of humorous expressions such as 'fart sack' which means a cotton mattress cover that completely contains a 'rack' or thin mattress. Military expressions, for example, friendly fire, are a frequent source of satirical humor.
Funny military jokes
Military jokes are often quite blunt. There is nothing that beats the laughter from a military joke. The people in the military are often disciplined and have rock-hard bodies. Just like everyone else though, they also have a soft spot for jokes, especially the world-class gags that speak about the experience of what being a soldier is like. Soldiers are the main users of these funny military jokes. Since their work is quite tough, the ability to joke about their occupation is pretty much a necessity. Other than the soldiers, normal citizens or people of all ages use these jokes to get an insight into what the military is like and also make light of different situations.
The best military jokes are brought about by the fact that they are made up of relatable experiences the soldiers go through either during training or all through their line of duty. They are also very simple and easy to understand, making their enjoyment more and their use more widespread.
Clean military jokes
Just like all genres of jokes, military jokes also have a sub-grouping of jokes that are meant for the older individuals in a society due to their obscenity and deeper meanings. When using military jokes, it is important to know your audience to know the kinds of military jokes that would be age-appropriate and acceptable. An example of a clean military joke is;
A lieutenant was mad at a cadet in training and growled at him saying, "I did not see you at camouflage training this morning!" The cadet in training looked quite pleased with himself answering, "Thank you very much, sir."
Military jokes marine
The marine is the branch of the military that handles navy-related campaigns. The marine military jokes are associated with the sea, their work equipment such as the submarines, and their diving gear. The jokes also include the sea animals
and everything sea-related.
Lessons learned from military jokes
The saying goes, laughter is the best medicine. Who would not use a little laughter about now, right?
Other than the fact that there are short military jokes that can be used and enjoyed by individuals of all ages, there are various lessons that can be drawn from all across the branches of the military.
These lessons include:
1. The environment one works in can be lightened up. Jokes shared between veterans at work lighten up the work environment. The veterans need to share jokes as the work they do can be very strenuous and draining. Short military jokes here and there, therefore, act as reminders that the environment does not always have to be gloomy and tense.
2. The jokes, for example, the conversation between the lieutenant and cadet in training about the camouflage training; teach the importance of always trying to see things from different points of view. The cadet thought that he had not seen the cadet but in reality, that is the point of camouflage training, the blending in with your environment. Patience is key, so is open-mindedness.
3. The jokes also teach the importance of moving past bad times in only a short period. Considering veterans don't have all the time in the world to sulk over their failures, a good lesson for them is just how the jokes come and go, so do the failures and disappointments in their field of work.
Military jokes are extremely bone-cracking and entertaining. Laugh today at some short military joke! It is recommended for you as it releases stress and boosts your mood.