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Sports Jokes ⚽🥊⛷️ in 2023

Why did the football quit the team?
– It was tired of being kicked around!

What do you call the basketball play where you drink too much and then score?
– Slam Drunk.

Where do catchers sit at lunch?
– Behind the plate.

Which fast-food chain is most likely to win a basketball tournament?
– Dunkin’ Donuts.

Which team is the chewiest?
– The Toffees!

What do you call a monkey who wins back-to-back titles?
– The Chimpion.

Why did Cinderella get kicked off the football team?
– Because she kept running away from the ball!

What do you call a player that constantly misses slam dunks?
– Alley Whoops.

How are scrambled eggs and football teams the same?
– They’ve both been beaten.

What did Santa bring the naughty soccer player?
– COOOOOOOAAAAAAAAALLLLLLLLL!

What do you call someone who stands inside goalposts and stops the ball rolling away?
– Annette!

What’s the chilliest ground in the Premiership?
– Cold Trafford!

What goes all the way around the baseball field but never moves?
– The fence.

Why do basketball players like cookies?
– It’s just another excuse to dunk.

How do football players deal with their problems?
– They tackle them head on.

Which goalie can jump higher than the crossbars?
– All of them. Crossbars can’t jump.

Have you heard about the new Arsenal Bra?
– It has a lot of support but no cups!

What does a baseball player do when he starts losing his eyesight?
– He becomes an umpire.

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