Construction is a major industry in any area of the world and is a part of life every day. With so many projects, both road and building, happening at any time, there are certainly a large number of construction jokes that relate to all aspects of the industry.
Why are windows known to not laugh at any jokes?
– Because they don’t really like cracking up!
Why was the accused worker discharged by the court?
– Because they couldn’t find any concrete evidence against him!
What would you say if a construction company hires a lot of dwarves as their employees?
– You would surely say that they are very short-staffed!
A construction worker walks into a bar.
– After getting thoroughly wasted, he has to be carted away in an ambulance.
A month later, his immediate supervisor walks into the same bar. After he also gets thoroughly wasted, he also has to be carted away in an ambulance.
A month later, the construction foreman walks into the very same bar.
The land owner fired that construction company straight away, stating that depth perception was a requirement for building his house.
If you want to hear a joke about construction…
…come back later. I’m still working on it.
Why did the plumber leave fixing drains?
– Because the work was too draining for him!
What did the idle carpenter say to his manager?
– “I am very board, it wood be best to give me some work.”
What is a construction worker’s favorite dance move?
– Raise the roof.
Two construction workers were eating lunch on a bench on the side of the road…
As they were eating lunch, they notice a very attractive woman walking on the other side of the road. The two workers start to cat call her until she stops and looks at them.
Once she looks at them, they make the notion for her flash them by pulling up on their shirts. The woman looks around and hesitantly pulls up her shirt and waves at them.
The two workers are getting all excited and see if they can take it further. They start yelling across the street for her to completely strip for them. Once again, she looks around and hesitantly gets completely naked on the side of the road and blows them a kiss!
At this point, the two workers are jumping up and down and giving each other high fives. All of a sudden, the female looks at them and yells, “Your Turn!”
The two construction workers are getting nervous and one turns to the other and says, “Show her ur nuts, show her ur nuts!!”
So the worker nods his head and starts flailing his arms and yelling “Lahanalahailaoalhiao”
How did Jesus do in the construction test today?
– He nailed it!
What did the chief constructor say to his juniors on their first day at work?
– “Marble is a fine stone but never ever take it for granite!”
Why couldn’t I say anything when a worker asked me to comment on his tools?
– It was due to the fact that I didn’t have any drill bits!
Me: I had to quit my construction job because I wasn’t strong enough for the work.
Friend: Did you give them your too weak notice?
My construction worker friend died
– As a memorial everyone at his funeral stood around making themselves look busy
How does one construct a road at the artic pole?
– One must use snow cones!
Which bird is most ideally suited to work for a construction company?
– It most obviously is a crane!
One of our construction workers just quit because he wasn’t strong enough to do the work. He gave us his two-weak notice.
A vampire decided to use his immortality to research the best career
– He tried every type of job there was, from innovation to construction to civil service, and he landed on the job of mirror cleaner.
In his book on the subject, he said that the tai chi like motions of the arms were very relaxing, and the mirror will certainly get dirty again leading to job security.
“I’m as surprised as you are,” wrote the vampire. “It was not a job I could see myself doing.”
Most Popular Categories
🡫 See all categories 🡫
Jokes About Construction Workers
Top construction jokes are often about the people who work in construction. Most often they are referring to the builders themselves, the hands on workers who complete the tasks of physically building the project. Construction is not only about buildings, but also roads, bridges, tunnels, and the other systems that keep a city or country functioning. Each of these types of construction have their own regulations, certifications, and education requirements.
Many hilarious construction jokes are focused on the construction workers and those who are responsible for supervising each phase of the project. Some comment on stereotypes about how they dress, eat, or what types of conversations and jokes they share. Other silly construction jokes are based upon assumptions of how may breaks they take, how often they have downtime throughout the day, and even how hard they work. Corny construction jokes about the workers may even imply that they all have similar traits and characteristics. Some silly construction jokes may even comment on what their home life may be like after they are finished work for the day or the hobbies that they enjoy.
Jokes About Construction Timelines and Budgets
One liner construction jokes about how they are always over budget and running late are very common and used by many different groups of people. Some jobs will run late due to material problems, shortages, or surprises that are discovered during demolition processes or once the building has begun. Funny construction jokes about the budgets and expectations can be popular among many people, including at sporting events or when friends are spending time together.
Short construction jokes about how long road construction takes are some of the most common and best construction jokes. There are many unpredictable occurrences and delays that can occur when working with roads including weather, the soil and stability of the ground beneath the road, traffic, and more. These may be some of the hardest projects to stay on time with due to all the things that must work together to finish them, and drivers will regularly share their favourite and funniest construction jokes about how some seasons are just construction season.
Where Are They Most Popular?
As construction and building occurs everywhere in the world, there are some places that will use cute construction jokes more than others. Television shows that are based around construction, renovations, and more will be home to some. While completing tasks the construction workers themselves may share their favourite jokes about the experiences they’ve had on the job, people they have worked for, and homeowners they have built for. Sharing their own favourite funny construction jokes and stories can help to release stress and frustrations over delays, people who are unpleasant to work with, and the natural changes from being very busy during some seasons to not busy at all in others. It can be unpredictable and require additional savings during busy periods to cover for when things are slower and there are fewer jobs to be completed.
Kids shows will have construction jokes for kids
, especially shows that involve real or cartoon construction workers, construction related vehicles, and even tools. Within these shows and cartoons the machines or tools will be able to talk, and while educating children on their tasks, how they work, and what each job entails, they will also share cute stories and jokes. Weather jokes
, garden jokes, and kids jokes are all likely to be included at some point as well, as each affects the construction before it begins and can affect it until the project is finished.
Construction jokes can be used by construction workers to share experiences with others, can be used by drivers and builders who are frustrated with slow progress or high expenses, or heard on television shows or movies. In each of these situations they are shared to create bonds, to have shared stories, and to find others who have similar experiences. It is important to mental health to have people who understand a job or task, and that can understand how the stress and pressure feel, especially if they have similar jobs.