Construction is a major industry in any area of the world and is a part of life every day. With so many projects, both road and building, happening at any time, there are certainly a large number of construction jokes that relate to all aspects of the industry.
What does a reptile carpenter in the Jurassic age use for cutting wood?
– He probably used a dino-saw!
What did the chief engineer instruct during the construction of Big Ben?
– He asked workers to work right under the clock.
I didn’t expect much from the movie about construction workers, but it was actually quite riveting.
Did you hear the amazing story about the blind construction worker?
– He picked up a hammer and saw.
Seven construction men are all workings at the roadside…
– That’s the joke…
Which band do construction workers love listening to the most?
– They absolutely love ‘The Carpenters’.
What does a construction manager tell his workers?
– He usually tells them to nail the delivery!
My manager asked me for a blueprint so I stuck my hand in blue ink and pressed my palm on his desk.
Easiest way to tell a scientist from a construction worker?
– Have them pronounce unionize.
Why did the constructor shy away from making construction jokes?
– Because the joke still needed some work!
What did the stand-up comic say about his road construction joke?
– He could only lay it for everyone in some time.
What was the most groundbreaking invention?
– It had to be the jackhammer.
I got T-boned by a construction delivery truck the other day.
– It came down like a ton of bricks.
A Russian, a Mexican, and a Korean all show up to a construction site and get hired.
– The boss says that for their first day on the job, the Russian is in charge of concrete, the Mexican is in charge of wood, and the Korean is in charge of supplies.
The boss then leaves and comes back a few hours later to check up on his new workers.
He walks over to the Russian, and all the concrete mix is stacked up nice and orderly. The boss tells him “great work!” and moves on.
He walks up to the Mexican and sees that al the wood is stacked in a perfect pile, so he says “wonderful job!” and moves on.
He then looks around and sees that the Korean is missing, and supplies are everywhere. Out of nowhere, the Korean jumps out from behind a pile of dirt and yells “SUPPLIES!”
What similarity do you find between a volleyball player and a carpenter?
– Both are equally known for liking hammer spikes!
What do you say to an amateur worker having difficulty with the saw?
– “If you can pull it, then don’t bother pushing it”.
What do construction workers say when they successfully complete a task?
– Nailed it!
An attorney asks an engineer to gather some evidence at a newly laid construction site.
– He examines everything he can – looking for any evidence in the steel beams, the pipes, the equipment around, even the rebar where the foundation will be set in hopes to find anything to use in the case.
With his findings in hand, he returns to the attorney’s office. “Well, I’ve got some good news, and some bad news.” he says, “Good news is, I’ve looked at what I can find and Ive got a couple of theories.”
The attorney, glad to have some more to go off of, replies, “Well that’s great! What’s the bad news, then?”
The engineer replies, “Well that’s the thing – they’re just theories.
I haven’t gotten any concrete evidence.”
Jokes About Construction Workers
Top construction jokes are often about the people who work in construction. Most often they are referring to the builders themselves, the hands on workers who complete the tasks of physically building the project. Construction is not only about buildings, but also roads, bridges, tunnels, and the other systems that keep a city or country functioning. Each of these types of construction have their own regulations, certifications, and education requirements.
Many hilarious construction jokes are focused on the construction workers and those who are responsible for supervising each phase of the project. Some comment on stereotypes about how they dress, eat, or what types of conversations and jokes they share. Other silly construction jokes are based upon assumptions of how may breaks they take, how often they have downtime throughout the day, and even how hard they work. Corny construction jokes about the workers may even imply that they all have similar traits and characteristics. Some silly construction jokes may even comment on what their home life may be like after they are finished work for the day or the hobbies that they enjoy.
Jokes About Construction Timelines and Budgets
One liner construction jokes about how they are always over budget and running late are very common and used by many different groups of people. Some jobs will run late due to material problems, shortages, or surprises that are discovered during demolition processes or once the building has begun. Funny construction jokes about the budgets and expectations can be popular among many people, including at sporting events or when friends are spending time together.
Short construction jokes about how long road construction takes are some of the most common and best construction jokes. There are many unpredictable occurrences and delays that can occur when working with roads including weather, the soil and stability of the ground beneath the road, traffic, and more. These may be some of the hardest projects to stay on time with due to all the things that must work together to finish them, and drivers will regularly share their favourite and funniest construction jokes about how some seasons are just construction season.
Where Are They Most Popular?
As construction and building occurs everywhere in the world, there are some places that will use cute construction jokes more than others. Television shows that are based around construction, renovations, and more will be home to some. While completing tasks the construction workers themselves may share their favourite jokes about the experiences they’ve had on the job, people they have worked for, and homeowners they have built for. Sharing their own favourite funny construction jokes and stories can help to release stress and frustrations over delays, people who are unpleasant to work with, and the natural changes from being very busy during some seasons to not busy at all in others. It can be unpredictable and require additional savings during busy periods to cover for when things are slower and there are fewer jobs to be completed.
Kids shows will have construction jokes for kids
, especially shows that involve real or cartoon construction workers, construction related vehicles, and even tools. Within these shows and cartoons the machines or tools will be able to talk, and while educating children on their tasks, how they work, and what each job entails, they will also share cute stories and jokes. Weather jokes
, garden jokes, and kids jokes are all likely to be included at some point as well, as each affects the construction before it begins and can affect it until the project is finished.
Construction jokes can be used by construction workers to share experiences with others, can be used by drivers and builders who are frustrated with slow progress or high expenses, or heard on television shows or movies. In each of these situations they are shared to create bonds, to have shared stories, and to find others who have similar experiences. It is important to mental health to have people who understand a job or task, and that can understand how the stress and pressure feel, especially if they have similar jobs.