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Vaccine jokes 💉😷 in 2025

What do you call a coffee filter mask?
– A coughy filter.

My husband purchased a world map and then gave me a dart and said, “Throw this and wherever it lands—that’s where I’m taking you when this pandemic ends.” Turns out, we’re spending two weeks behind the fridge.

Why isn’t Holy Water used in vaccines ?
– Because, you can’t take the Lords name in vein.

Why is there global chip shortage?
– Because it all went into vaccines.

Since we’re all in quarantine I guess we’ll be making only inside jokes from now on.

What should you do if you don’t understand a coronavirus joke?
– Be patient.

Joe Rogan caught COVID but made a near-complete recovery. Unfortunately, he’s still not able to smell jiu-jitsu.

Anti vaccine americans being ignorant isn’t their fault
– They didn’t go to school because they are scared of being shot

The one rat asked the other rat if he’s had the vaccine?
– Nope, they’re still testing it on humans

Let’s see how that goes

I thought you had to wear a mask when entering businesses. They kept yelling at me to put on some pants.

Yeah, I have plans tonight. I’ll probably hit the living room around 8 or 9.

I finally convinced my hillbilly friend to get a Covid vaccination, but he doesn’t want Moderna.
– He says, “ just because she sang some good pop songs back in the 80s don’t mean she knows how to make a vaccine!”.

I had heart palpitations, sweating and aches on the day of my first Covid-19 Vaccine
– But once I got in and actually had the jab I was fine

Why do they call it the novel coronavirus?
– It’s a long story….

During the pandemic, it’s important to take after NASA. Give people space.

Covid vaccine is not safe
– My friend had gotten both his doses. Still died when he fell off the 19th floor.

I think Pfizer got their drugs mixed up…
– I got the Covid vaccine, but now when I cough I get an erectipn.

I’m not talking to myself, I’m having a parent-teacher conference.

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