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Car Jokes 🚗 in 2024

My sister argued with me that you can’t make a car out of spaghetti,
– you should have seen her face when I drove pasta

Where do pickles go to buy a car?
-The dillership!

Thought this up while driving behind a car with a Star Wars Rebel sticker on it.
-What is the favorite type of weather of Stormtroopers?

Mist

Just a quick note to my American cousins. Voting is like driving a car….
– ‘D’ to go forward.

‘R’ to go reverse.

100 years ago everyone owned a horse and only the rick had cars. Today everyone own cars and only the rich own horses.
– The stables have turned.

Before Elon Musk got into electric cars…
-… he was plain old Lon Musk

Today I saw a car parked with a bumper sticker that said “I miss New york”
-So I smashed his window in and stole his radio.

What is the most edible part of a car?
-The passenger.

I went to the petrol station to pump up my car tyre…
-and the guy charged me 50p. I said “it was only 20p last week”. He said “that’s the price of inflation”

What did the road crew have to do after the cheese crashed it’s car?
-Clean up de-brie.

People tried telling me I couldn’t pull a trailer with my car
-but it went off without a hitch.

Lost track of my work because I just heard my car was involved in a drive-by
-My Focus is shot.

What is the sushi chef’s dream car?
-rolls rice

Two police officers crash their car into a tree. After a moment of silence, one of them says,
– “Wow, that’s got to be the fastest we’ve ever gotten to an accident site.”

Someone keyed the music teacher’s car
-Fortunately, the damage seems to B Minor.

A car is like a woman
-A car is like a woman.

If she looks hot and performs super well during the ride, you will spend as much money as you have to in order keep her engine revving for you.

I hope that one day, I can turbocharge my car
– But that’s just an aspiration

A cop pulls over a miner and asks “Whose car is this? Where are you headed? What do you do?”
-“Mine.”

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