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Yoga Jokes 🧘 in 2025

Told my yoga instructor to teach me the splits
– She asked “how flexible are you”
– I said “Weekdays are out of the question”

Sunrise Yoga
– I’m on vacation with my wife and she asks me do you want to join me for sunrise yoga tomorrow?

I replied ‘namaste in bed’

What does the yogi say when she gets electrocuted?
– Ohmmmmmm!

What did the yogi want for his birthday?
– Presence.

Do you know what’s the best thing about being a yoga instructor?
– The flexible hours.

Three things that never lie…..
– Little kids, drunk people, and yoga pants

What does the job ad on the door of the yoga studio say?
– Inquire within.

What did the yogi say to his dog?
– Nama, stay!

Being a yoga instructor puts you in a unique position.

Doing the splits
– I told my yoga instructor I wanted to be able to do the splits. She asked how flexible I was. I told her I couldn’t come on Tuesdays.

What kind of yoga do you do in a casket?
– De-compose.

What did the yogi do every night before bed?
– He let the dogma out.

What do Yoga meditation and a fudge cake have in common?
– They each bring you a piece or peace of heaven.

My wife claims to be very good at yoga…
– but I think she’s just a poser.

My friend tried to convince me that yoga is a workout…
I told him it’s a bit of a stretch

(Thought of this tonight during yoga)

What did the yoga teacher say when her friend asked her to leave the party?
– Nah, Imma stay.

What did Dorothy say after yoga class?
– There’s no place like om.

Why can’t you trust yoga instructors?
– Because everything they do is quite a stretch.

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